Ruin || Shawn Mendes

Stay With Me

{Shawn's POV}

I probably got so many speeding tickets on my way to the hospital. But there journey seemed like forever. And all I wanted was to be by her side. The thought of losing her was killing me.

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Weaving in and it of multiple corridors was no better. I was told she was in the Sarah Ward, whatever that was.

I was running, I didn't have time to walk.
However everything just kind of freezes when I saw her Mom by the coffee machine.

I take a deep breath before I approach her.
"Mrs Taylor?" I ask, quietly.
She turns around and gives me that look, to say as if Lexi was already gone.
"No... Oh god no." I stutter, with tears filling my eyes.
"Oh Shawn, Shawn, don't cry." She tries to reassure.
"What.... What did the doctor's say? I muffle.
"She has a um... a broken rib."
"Oh that's not too bad, she can recover from that." I say, with the tiniest bit of hope.
"It's not just that Shawn." She pauses. "They found her unconscious, and they haven't managed to wake her up yet."
"What?! No, that can't be right, they have to do something.-"
"Shawn they can't do anything, we just have to wait-"
"She can't just, not wake up?!"
"I know, we just have to have faith that she'll wake up soon, the doctors said the earlier she does wake the better.-" She replies.
"I just, I just wish there was something I could do to help her. God I feel so useless."
"Go in, talk to her, say what you need to say." She tries to smile.
"What are you going to do?" I ask.
"I'm going to call her Dad, I think it's time he comes back to see her-"
"In case she dies."
"I just, don't want anything left unsaid, I'll be back in a minute. Shawn be strong."She says, as she walks down the corridor and pulls out her phone.

I slowly walk into her room. She had a tube down her throat. There were drips everywhere, all different drugs being pumped into her.

I sat down beside her and held her cold hand.
I couldn't get the words I wanted to say to her, out of my mouth.
How was I suppose to tell her everything I feel for her? What my favourite things about her are? How I was meant to say goodbye?

I looked at her motionless face. The smile that was always painted on her face was wiped. If I'm being honest, her smile was my favourite part about her. Sometimes I would say stupid things just to see it. I swear, the entire fucking room lit up. I know that sounds like cheesy bullshit, but you realise all that cheesy bullshit is true when you actually fall hard for a girl.

And I know I don't deserve her, I'm the worlds biggest fuck up. But I love her and I know she loves me. That's why she has to wake up.

"Lexi I don't even know if you can hear me right now. But you're getting everyone really worried. Your Mom is calling your Dad because she thinks you're not going to make it. But let's prove them all wrong, just wake up.- Lexi just stay with me, everything will be alright."-
There was no use trying. Words aren't going to help.
"Lexi, just please wake up. I don't even know why you were walking around at 2am, but whatever the reason was, you could've just talked to me and I would've been there. God, I'd do so many things different if I could."

I pause, I look at the still silhouette of Lexi. This was it. I could try all I like, but I need to say goodbye. But how? How do you say goodbye to the person who you love?

"I don't know what to say, you know better than anyone I'm not the best in tough situations. I just usually flake, but I promise you this, I will never stop loving you, whether you're here or not. Lexi Taylor, I have found myself falling so hard for you. And if you need to go, you can, I won't blame you." I take a deep breath, as I try to contain my tears.

"Goodbye my love." I say, before I give her a slow kiss on her cheek.