I woke up to the sound of knocking on the door. I got up to answer it, but Adam was already there. It was Neil. He came because he wanted to check on us. Really?
"Aye, man. I just wanted to check up on you two. How are things?" Adam and I were silent.
"Uh, hey Neil. While youre here, I wanted to ask you if you had any free time later, I was hoping to talk to you about some songs I haven't finshed yet." I asked him. Adam looked at me, almost in shock. I know I used to work on songs with the whole band, but I just wanted to work alone with someone I trusted. And I trusted Neil.
"Um. I don't thing that I have any free time...I'm kinda going out with someone later. But we can work on them another day." I really was looking on getting them done today, I didn't want to be around Adam much.
"It's okay. I will just work on them by myself."
"Okay, so uh...do you guys need anything before I head out?" I looked at Adam, who was stating at the ground, looking deep in thought.
"No. You should get going. Thanks for stopping by though Neil." I told him. He pulled me outside for a second.
"Ariel, I need you to take care of him. I just....I don't know what's wrong with him lately, an I worry ya know? He's been my friend ever since 8th grade, and I don't want to lose him."
I looked at him reassuringly.
"Neil, don't worry. You won't lose him. Trust me."
"Thank you so much Ariel." he leaned down, hugged me and kissed me on the cheek. He always gave good hugs.
He left and I went back inside where Adam no where to be seen. I went into his room to find him playing his guitar. I sat down on his bed, and tried to think of words to sing. I instantly thought of my lyrics:
"Standing on my own. Remembering the ones I left at home. Forget about the life I used to know, forget about the ones I left at home." Adam looked at me, put his guitar down. And put his head in his hands.
"Adam?" he sighed.
"Ariel?" he looked up at me.
"Can you please tell me, I won't get mad this time." I know what he's talking about. My cuts.
This time I sighed. "Look, that's my problem. I don't see why you have to know." I tried so hard to sound convincing and sure. But i could tell he knew I was broken on the inside about it. I looked at him. His eyes were staring right through me almost. Those green, empty tunnels of darkness.
"I am serious. Please, trust me."
"I cut because......because of my past. That day, when you got mad, you thought I cut because of you. I didn't. I wouldn't have cut because of you." I could tell he was relieved. But he realized I said didn't. He doesn't know that my most recent ones involved him.
"Why do you cut now?" he had a sad look on his face. I can't tell him.
"Please. Tell me." his eyes were now pleading.
"I cut because of you, okay? I cut because of you." I pushed the cold truth out. I choked on the words.
I watched a single tear streaming down his cheek. I just sat there on the bed, crouched over.
"I'm sorry, Ariel. I am sorry I did this too you. It's all my fault. All my fault. Please don't hurt yourself anymore. I can't lose you. I-I-" he still wasn't crying, but he was looking right me. And I was nearly crying. I went over to him, and wrapped my arms around him. Much like the night before. I felt so safe like this.
He pulled me off of him. I looked at him, and before I knew it, our lips interlocked. It was a very short kiss, I wasn't ready for. But I still kissed him back. I couldn't help it. As soon as I realized what just happened, I got up.
"Um...."
"I'm sorry...I just...I don't know Ariel. I miss you." I didn't know what to think of all this.
"Uh, I have to go out." and just like that, I was left thinking about him, more than ever.
