After The Storm (Sequel)

Breaking Point

Liliana's pov

The holidays have finally almost all passed except for New Years, which is today. I would be glad when this day was over and done with, so I wouldn't have to hear about anymore stupid holidays for awhile. Each holiday put me in a worse mood then I was in before, because everyone just seemed so joyful and happy, while I was just miserable and hurting.

All I could think about today is how wrong it felt to be going into a new year without Derek or George here, because I knew this wasn't how it was to supposed to be. Sometimes I still had a hard time accepting that they're both dead. Of course I know they're gone, but they were both such an overwhelming loss, that it's like my brain still can't process it at times. I think that's been the hardest thing about trying to keep it together. I wasn't just grieving one loss, I was grieving two.

A full year hadn't even passed since George died before Derek was dead to. Losing a child is something you grieve forever and so is losing your best friend, so for those two losses to happen so closely together is just a pain that can't even be understood unless you actually live it. I needed to keep my mind occupied to even manage to stay sane. That's why for the past couple of days I've been back to working pretty much 24/7. I figured out how to get into the surgery schedule and make it look like I've been working less hours then I actually have like I used to do when I was an intern, that way Richard can't tell how long I've been working and make me go home. Whenever I'm not operating I've been burying myself in paperwork. I'm just doing whatever I can do to keep my mind occupied. That's the only thing that keeps me from laying in bed and crying my eyes out like I really want to.

"Hey." Jackson says as he walks over to the front desk where I'm looking over the surgery schedule

"Hey." I sigh.

"Happy New Years." He smiles.

"Happy New Years" I nod.

"I wanted to let you know that my mom is in town visiting. I don't know if she's coming by the hospital, but I just wanted to let you know in case she does and you run into her" He says.

"Oh. Thanks for the heads up" I say

"You're welcome"

"If that's all, I have to go. I need to go prep my patient for surgery." I say.

"Um no, that's actually not all. I wanted to know if you're coming home tonight. I mean you haven't been home in the past three days." He sighs.

"I'm fine, I've been getting rest. I just go to the on-call room whenever I get tired. You know how busy things are through the holidays. I needed to be here to make sure things ran smoothly." I say

"Well today is the last holiday, so maybe you can come home tonight?" He suggests,

"We'll see" I sigh.

"Liliana" he sighs

"I really need to go get my patient prepped" I say before walking away. I know that Jackson is worried about me, but like I've told him a million times he doesn't need to be. I know how to take care of myself.

I go prep my patient for surgery before taking him to the O.R. and getting scrubbed in. My surgery only takes around 4 hours before I finish successfully. After scrubbing out I leave to take the patient to recovery.

"Hey Lily, I was wondering if you had time to go grab a cup of coffee?" Alex asks as he catches up with me after I walk out of my patients room.

"Sorry, I'm actually really busy. I need to go finish the department schedule before my next surgery. I have a busy, busy day." I sigh as we stop at the front desk.