Torn // Emilio Martinez

Chapter 35

Marcus

Lucas and I shut the door on Emilio and turned to each other, waiting for the other to start talking.
"Do we tell Bella he was here?" Lucas asked as he looked out the window to see Emilio walking down the street with his head down.
"We can't," I answered, shaking my head. 
"Why?"
"Because then she'll go running back to him after all the pain he's caused her. He's done enough, she needs to work on moving on instead of having him come back for her whenever he feels it's convenient," I explained angrily to my twin.
"But she loves him, Marcus. I know you want her but she loves him. Maybe telling her and having them work stuff out will get her out of the funk she's in right now," Lucas said back, trying to get me to change my mind.
"She won't love him forever, she'll get over it and we'll have our best friend back without him getting in the way," I shot back.

Lucas said nothing afterwards and he told me to shut up as Bella came down the stairs from her room, her hair tied up messily and her pajamas still on. Despite all of this I still thought she was the most beautiful girl ever. I felt bad for ruining her relationship with Emilio, but I don't regret kissing her. It's something I had wanted to do for the longest time, and I can't sad I'm sad Emilio is finally out of the picture.
"Did I hear someone at the door?" she asked, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
"Yeah, just our mom telling us something," I lied, shrugging it off so she wouldn't ask either of us further questions. She walked into the kitchen and got cereal, sitting down on the couch as she ate it.
"How you doing today?" Lucas asked her, sitting down next to her as she rested her head on his shoulder.
"I've been better," she mumbled, taking another bite.
"You're better off without him, B," I said to her, trying to comfort her.
"You don't know that," she snapped back.
"He's hurt you more than once, you deserve someone else," I replied calmly.
"I don't want anyone else," she whispered as she stood up and walked away from us into the kitchen, putting her bowl in the sink.

"I'm going to shower, you guys should go home, your family probably misses you," she said as she walked upstairs and we heard a door shut.

Bella

I started the water in the shower and took off my clothes, seeing my face and body fog up in the mirror. I stepped into the shower and let the hot water slide down my skin. I shut my eyes and tilted my head up so the water was hitting my face. After a while I sat on the tile floor, my legs curled up to my chest as the hot water continued to hit my bare skin from above.

I thought about everything that happened with Ivan and Emilio, and burst into tears. Luckily, even if the boys didn't go home, they weren't able to hear my cries over the sound of the shower. I thought about how I ruined everything and Emilio would never be able to trust me again. He already struggled with trust because of Marcus, I can't imagine how he would feel if he found out what I did with Ivan. It was an accident and I regretted it, but the damage was done, I couldn't do anything now except face it.

Marcus telling me to just move on hurt as well. As if it was something so easy to do. If he thought I was going to be with him now that Emilio was out of the way, he needed to stop dreaming and face reality. Emilio has hurt me, but only because I hurt him first. I was to blame for everything that had happened between us, and they had no reason to hate him.

I had received worried texts from everyone, but I chose to ignore them, not wanting to lie to everyone about why I left. Emilio probably felt guilty, or maybe he felt nothing at all. Maybe he was happy to see me gone, he could live his life without having to worry about me or even make time for me. He could live his way and how he wanted without anything or anyone hindering him. If I ever went back to LA I would just cause an explosion and ruin things. I don't know how I'm supposed to face any of them again after what I had done.

Maybe one day it will be easier, but that day won't come any time soon.
For now, I am alone on my bathroom floor, the only sounds being that of the running water hitting the floor and the sounds of my own sobs filling the room.

"I'm sorry, Emilio," I whispered to myself, knowing he couldn't hear it, but wishing he could.