The Good Boy Stopped Us From Falling Apart

Chapter 32- What Is Love

Flynn P.O.V:

      I walked down the hallway with furrowed brows squeezing the strap of my bag. I was on my way out of a class and was making my way to the dormitory, deep in thought. I didn't understand any of it. Love was so complicated and weird. And maturity. What the check was with that? I didn't understand what any of it meant. And if I was with my mother I knew I would have her to answer my every question. But now I had to figure it all out on my own.

Eyes directed to the floor, trying to make sense of the things I felt, I bumped into someone knocking their books to the floor.

"Shoot!" I quickly leaned over and began to pick them up. "I'm so sorry," I looked up at the person.

"Hi," a familiar smile spread across the man's face.

"Professor McAllister," I smiled back. "How are you?"

"I'm well."

I nodded. "I'm really sorry about bumping into you like that-"

"It's fine. Probably more my fault than yours."

I nodded again then I furrowed my brows. "Professor, can I ask you something?"

"Anything. As long as it doesn't get me fired."

I forced a polite chuckle then I gulped. "I've gotten over my ex recently and I'm trying to..you know..get to know myself before I start dating again. And I feel like I have no idea how love works because I loved her for...since forever. I feel clueless about all of it. How do I know if I really loved her if I don't even know what it is?"

He smiled then chuckled.

I gulped. Did I sound stupid? What was so funny?

"You sound like me not too long ago. You're just wise enough to ask someone. Flynn, when we're born, most of us, if not all, begin to love before we even know what it is. Love is feeling a connection to someone or something."

"I've heard that so many times and I still don't feel like it's the answer...to me. Why do we get over things if we love them so much?"

"Okay," he squinted his eyes and adjusted his book on his forearm. "What's your favorite show?"

"Uh...Gotham."

"Okay. Why do you like this show?"

"Because it's cool. The characters are okay."

"Favorite character?"

"Definitely Jim Gordon."

He smiled. "Completely agree. Now, imagine they've killed that character off and kept the show running without him."

"They did that with "The Office" when they let Steve Carell leave the show."

"Did you enjoy that show after that?"

"It wasn't the same," I shook my head. "I kept waiting for him to come back."

"So, your love for the show changed after he left?"

I nodded.

"Okay. Now your ex. Why do you think you loved her?"

I looked down. "She was nice to everyone...forgave everyone. She had a short temper but I always calmed her down. But I was more caught up in her than she was in me."

"And when you realized that you stopped loving her-"

"No. I kept loving her like an idiot."

"Waiting for Steve Carell to come back to the show."

I looked at him with furrowed brows. "What?"

"It's an analogy. Like you waited for Stevel Carell to return to The Office, you waited for your ex to change. Until you realized she wasn't going to and got over her, am I right?"

I smiled and nodded. "You're right...So, how do I know what I'm looking for in a person?"

"By knowing who you are and learning to love yourself first." He looked at his watch. "I have to go to my class. Don't do what the rest of the world seems to be doing. Take your time. Don't rush to grow up or rush to find someone. Find yourself first."

"Thank you," I nodded.

He walked away.

I sighed. He was right. Oliver had said something alone those lines to me many times but the wording was never right.

I put my headphones over my ears and began to listen to music. I furrowed my brows then I took my headphones off. The song that was playing was one Harley had introduced me to. I wasn't a fan but I listened to it because of her. I scrolled through my playlist as I walked, realizing that most of my songs were hers. Even before we became close, I had begun to listen to music I thought she had liked. I shook my head. Where was my originality?

I walked into my dorm.

Oliver sat on his bed.

"Dude, I have no songs of my own. Just a bunch of songs I either heard Harley playing or that she recommended to me. You were right. I was obsessed." I chuckled and looked at him.

He sat on his bed with a sad look on his face.

"Hey," I walked over to him and sat beside him. "What's wrong?"

"I can't pretend I'm okay with seeing her around him anymore."

"Seeing who? What's going on?"

"Courtney. She was with Toby when she tried to sleep with me at that party."

"How do you know that?"

"Because I sat with them at lunch today and the guys were talking about the party and he mentioned finding her with a broken nose that night and not knowing what happened. He said she never told him what happened and that he's going to kill whoever did that to her."

I sighed. "So, what do you want to?"

"There's a party tonight. I want to catch her in the act."

I furrowed my brows. "She said you were the only one-"

"She seemed like a natural to me," he raised his brows. "Toby would never believe me if I just told him."

"We can try. It's not a guarantee... but we can try. What's the plan?"

He sighed.