I AM (Connor X OC) - DBH

Chapter 74 - The First Element

I stepped inside and Nick took a deep breath. Knowing very well that this is the only time we're truly alone, and the only time for the next while where Nick will be able to talk to me, he pressed the elevator button and began to speak.

"The only reason I volunteered is that when you found me that day, looking over the edge of my old apartment...I was close to that edge. Close to ending it all, okay? Sometimes, I feel like life is catching up to me all too quickly, so maybe the same thing happened to this android. Maybe deviancy just isn't right for him. So, I need to help him. I need to talk him down," Nick sighed, trying to shake off the emotions of the situation.

"Nick, it's alright to admit difficulty," I explained.

"Oh. Yes. Sure. Except when the product of failing is an android pancake...that is also on fire. It's just terrible," Nick answered, cradling his head. "I really want to do this, but I feel weak. Weak at the knees, like I'm a fucking idiot."

"No. Nick, you're just feeling exceeding amounts of stress. That's normal. This situation is serious. It would be ridiculous if you didn't feel like this," I explained.

"I am super glad that for no reason at all, everything you say is the right thing," Nick said, leaning up against the wall of the elevator."

"Yep. No reason," I answered sarcastically. No reason at all that the computer can do calculations. 

"No, Charlotte. You actually know what to say. Sure, you can do the math, but the answers aren't always clear. Human's aren't clear. So you knowing what to say, that's you," Nick explained. The doors opened up, and Nick sighed deeply before stepping out of the elevator. The top floor opened up directly into a maintenance tunnel. Simply opening up the exit door, we would be on top of the roof and be looking at an android who is so incredibly overwhelmed. Nick took a deep breath and mentally prepared to step out. It's pretty clear to me that Nick isn't strong enough to do this, but I still think he will be successful, and I don't need to calculate that. 

Nick braced himself and opened the door. The cold January air hit us both, and there we saw the android, damp, and looking over the edge, facing away from us. The smell of gasoline was heavy and overwhelming. 

Updating...

"His name is Silvio. He has never been owned, and was a Cyberlife store rescue," I explained to Nick. 

"Hello, Silvio!" Nick called out. The android turned around and was clearly an X67. They are a unit designed explicitly to play baseball. He turned out with a rather confused expression on his face. He fiddled with his pocket though quickly. He must be getting out the lighter.

"No! Don't!" Nick called back. Silvio put it back in his pocket. Nick sighed deeply. "Don't move."

"Where is the fucking jump team?" He asked turning around to me.

"I don't know," I answered. Nick sighed and turned back to Silvio. 

"So, tell me Silvio, what has got you up here?" Nick asked. Silvio didn't respond. "Okay, that's okay. I've got some time to kill. Some stories to tell. But...first...put away the lighter."

Silvio didn't move. "Too much? That's okay," Nick sighed. "You know, I've been right where you are. I've looked down the barrel of a gun, stared at a handful of pills, and felt the call of the void. It's real, alright. But the most important thing, is that I'm still here, so shit had to get better right?"

"Not according to my calculations," Silvio asserted. "There is a 99% chance that I will fail. That I will fail in my life."

"Ah but you're talking to me right now. That's what matters," Nick admitted, sighing a bit. "Listen, Silvio...statistics change. Things go haywire much more often than you're expecting. Maybe in different circumstances, you could be looking at a 99% chance of success. You have to work to make that number go down."

"You don't know! You don't know how many possibilities I've explored!" Silvio responded, yelling aggressively. Nick looked down. 

"You're right. I don't. It's got to be so much worse when you can be so accurate. But even the best androids and the best computers couldn't calculate every single possibility. It's just not possible."

Silvio looked at Nick. This time, he didn't speak. In all honesty, it's impossible to tell exactly what Silvio is thinking. Are we moving in the right direction, or the wrong one? With Silvio, I can only hope it's positive. 

Nick almost wanted to look away, and turn away. He wanted to leave but stopped himself. "We're getting you out of this, okay? Okay, Silvio?" Nick explained, quite aggressively to also be so caring. 

"No. You're not. You can't change fate," Silvio responded.

"You're right! I can't! But you can!" Nick answered. I finally stepped forward.

"Listen, Silvio. Things may be difficult, but you can't let this trip you up," I explained.

Silvio stared at me, not saying a word. "Silvio. Tell us what you need. Do you need someone to care? Someone, to agree? Someone, to disagree?" I offered.

"I need to leave. I need to abandon this," Silvio said, gesturing to the greater world. "I don't want this. I just don't want to be here."

"Okay..." Nick sighed. He made eye contact with me for a brief second. It communicated everything. I need to be prepared to make a grab, which may be near impossible. He would light himself on fire first, and then immediately jump. I would have to be fast and would have to grab him from a lower limb. I need to be just 5 feet away.

I gave a quick nod, and Lance nodded back. Silvio fiddled with his lighter. Nick began to talk again.

"Listen...Life takes unexpected turns sometimes," Nick said, distracting him for enough time so that I could begin my approach slowly. 

"It does not always have to be fair. In fact, it rarely will be."

20 feet left.

"There's nothing satisfying, encouraging, or even mildly exciting about it."

15 feet left.

"It's a bit frightening," Nick admitted. Silvio lowered his lighter a bit.

10 feet left.

"But that's what living is about."

5 feet. Suddenly, Silvio noticed just how close I was, and quickly flipped the cap on his lighter."

I jumped.