his fake boyfriend ➸ hyunin

twenty one

'don't let him in.' jeongin's mind told him but he didn't listen, he mumbled a soft "okay" as he slowly opened the door and let the older in.

hyunjin nodded in appreciation as he sat down, he took notice of the plushie he had won jeongin sitting on the couch and he smiled at that,

"i see you kept him."

"yeah." jeongin said as he sat down opposite to the older as he turned off the television before diverting his full attention to his visitor.

"what do you want hyung?" he asked.

truth be told, he had not expected hyunjin to come here, sure, they weren't meeting eye to eye right now but the younger didn't know that it would mean that he'd show up here unexpected.

"h-how are you?" hyunjin stuttered.

"i'm okay, thank you." jeongin replied softly, refusing to meet hyunjin's eyes, which made the older frown slightly.

"i- i also missed you.." hyunjin added and jeongin stilled.

'i miss you too hyungie.. so much.'

"w-what do you want hyung?" jeongin asked again as hyunjin sighed,

"i want to say i'm sorry, w-what i did was wrong and i shouldn't have done that."

'don't listen to his lies.'
'he doesn't want you.'

"c-can we pretend this never happened baby? i- i want us to continue what we have."

'i'm not kim seungmin.'

"please?"

'i'm not some toy you could play with and toss around when you get bored.'

"b-baby? please say something?"

"please don't call me baby anymore."

silence.

hyunjin stared at him in surprise, he didn't expect jeongin to say something like that, it caught him off guard.

"i'm not seungmin.. i'm not your baby." jeongin replied, looking down, still refusing to look him in the eye.

hyunjin flinched at the mention of the name, it's as if someone poured a cold bucket of water all over him.

"i told you-"

"i know, i'm sorry." jeongin cut him off as he played with the hem of his shirt.

"but it's true right? i'm not him and i will never be him."

'i'll never be who your heart will long for.'

"i don't. but you, you want him to be me yes? someone who you have putty in your fingers, someone at your beck and call."

'someone who could actually return your feelings.'

"but i'm not seungmin right? it sucks, but that's life i guess."

"i-"

"i'm sorry to disappoint, i'll do better. this sunday, i'll put on a show that'll make everyone believe you moved on from him. that you don't have feelings for seung-"

"SHUT UP!" hyunjin snapped, making jeongin stop midway as hyunjin stood up, his breathing heavy and there were tears in his eyes.

"SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP! I KNOW I FUCKED UP, I KNOW I HURT YOU, I KNOW THAT WHAT I DID WAS A DICK MOVE BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP SAYING HIS FUCKING NAME!"

"stop telling me what to do! i'm not-" jeongin snapped at him, he was afraid to look at hyunjin's eyes, afraid that he would get hypnotized by his stare, like a moth to a flame and he'd be too drunk with his emotions that he'll get hurt again.