Ride On

Twenty Two

I walk back into her room. I hear her crying. Can we just live happily. Its always one thing after another. She will be able to leave tomorrow morning. Maybe we can talk sometimes. While Im in deep thought, she mumbles.

"Im sorry" she sobbed

I walk up to her. I placed my hand gently on her back. She kind of flinched then relaxed. I gave her a smooth back massage. I know this bed is uncomfortable for her. I didnt wanna say anything. Then she moved over, so I can lay down next to her. I'd like to talk about it but I prefer it would be us alone. I know she has her plate full. Already missin a rodeo and has to pay for turn out fees. Not the kind of year she hoped to start out. Jade snuggle into my embrace. Soon we fell asleep in no time.

*Next Day*

I look to my right and see Jade still asleep. I slowly remove myself from the bed. I walked into her bathroom. When I get done with my business, I walk out to find Jade awake. She looked like hell to be honest. Her eyes were puffy red and her hair was wildly out of control. She still had the ivy in her. I see a lil bag hanging. It was insulin. This wasnt a dream at all. I walk over to the chair and sat down. Right now were sitting in silence. All we hear is people in the hall way talking, machines beeping, and the fan. I sat there minding my own business. I cant talk to her right now, as much like I like to.

A knock came from the door. In walks the doctor. He looks at Jade and then me.

"Uh.. bad timing" he said

"No.. I think I'll step out. This is between you and her"

I walk pass the doc and went to the waiting room. I like to be there for her. But Im scared that whatever she says wont be the whole truth. Better yet it may never be the truth. Maybe we rushed this marriage. I called Cody.

"Morning bud" Cody said

"Morning"

"You dont sound as great. Everything ok" he asked worriedly

"Yeah.. I didnt sleep well last night"

"Hang in there LJ. Hows Jade"

"Uh.. Shes with the doctor right now. I stepped out because theyre doing an exam" I partially lie

"Oh.. well let me know if y'all need anything"

"We will"

He hung up. My phone beeped, letting me know that my battery is about to die. I walked out to the truck and grabbed my charger. I walk back in the room. I see her packing her belongings. She didnt say one word to me and neither did I. The nurse came in with the discharge papers and handed her prescription paper.

"I can pick up my meds at any wal mart. When I need a refill" she asked

"Yes."

"Thanks"

Jade walked out of the room and I followed her. I was the first to walk out of the elevator because she doesnt know where were parked. We made it to the truck and she tossed her stuff in the back seat. She hopped in on the passenger side. We pulled out and went to wal mart. Again, its another silent ride.

We made it to wal mart. I parked and turned the truck off. She sat there, quite as ever. 'Ok. LJ you need to speak' I kept thinking. But nothing came to mind. I got off instead and stood outside the truck. Im still gathering that my wife has always been a diabetic. But she never told me. I like to know when she was diagnost. But the way she is right now, I cant ask or speak anything. Then she got out and walked in the store.

I looked on my phone to see if there is a lake near by. There was and it wasnt far from us. I waited outside for her. About thirty minutes later, she came back out with her prescription. I got back into the driver seat. I turned the map on, and followed the instructions.

"Where we goin" she asked

I didnt say anything. I kept my mouth shut.

"Are you deaf? I said where are we goin" she asked again annoyed

I bit my tongue down. I looked down and we were less than five miles away. In the distance we can see the lake. For some reason, going to a lake relaxes me. Right now, we need to settle this nonsense.  We pulled up to the lake. I turned the truck around, making the bed face out towards the lake. I turned the truck off and grabbed the keys and a blanket. I pulled the tailgate down. I laid the blanket down and sat on the tailgate. I starred out into the lake. There was no one in sight. Then I hear the truck door open.

"Can I join you" she asked softly

"Yeah"

She sat next to me. At the corner of my eye, I see her playing with her ring. I stare down at mine as well. Then I look out back into the lake. Seeing this lake makes me miss Porum.

"LJ. I'm sorry for everything" she said

"When were you gonna tell me" I asked

"When I found the right words and the right time"

"When were you diagnost"

"Four years ago"

"How"

"I was pregnant"

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Uh oh! How will LJ take it?

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