Chapter 40 Josh's POV
I walk my mother down the isle and she joins some others in the first row, then I take my place at the front and face the audience. In the next few minutes, I watch Connor with Molly's friend Erin and Jennifer with Daniel walk up, arm in arm, then part when they get to the end of the isle. Connor stands closest to me. I walk up closer to the end of the isle when I see Cody round the corner with Lydia. I feel my stomach start to flutter and a nervous lump forms in my throat, because I know he's the last one before her.
I force myself to refrain from bouncing on my toes. Her and both her Dad and her Step Dad come around the corner. I can see her Step Dad and half of her fluffy dress, but she is blocked from my view by an oblivious baby Lydia who clings onto her dads shoulder. As she comes closer, she slowly comes into my view.
She's as white as a ghost, but her skin glows against her pearly white dress. I saw her hair and make-up earlier, but for some reason, seeing it all together, her dress and her hair and her make-up, gets to me. I feel my breath catch in my throat, pushing tears into my eyes. I hold my hands up to cover my face for a second while I force air into my lungs. The smile that I feel spread across my face is so big it feels unreal. My cheeks hurt as I pull my hands away from my face.
She looks terrified. And then all of a sudden, I'm terrified that she's terrified.
As she walks a little closer, I get a better look at her.
Her eyes are a pale gray, the color they turn when she gets nervous. I'm a little reassured by this. She kisses her Dad and her Step Dad on the cheek and then turns to face me. I extend a shaking hand forward to her. Her hand is steady as she slides her fingers into the palm of my hand. I become aware of the photographer taking pictures of us like her life depends on it.
Molly looks up at me through her eye lashes and she kicks her dress out forward as she steps up onto the small lifted portion of the room that I already stand on. I lead her over to where the man, a friend of my mothers, who is going to marry us. He's smiling very brightly.
I hear everyone sits down and then he addresses the crowd of people, saying that we've all come here to "whiteness the union of two people who have decided to spend their lives together as one."
I lose track of what he's saying until he asks for us to present the rings. I turn to Connor, who is standing just a couple feet behind me. He pulls her ring from his pinky finger and drops it into my hand. I turn back to see Molly waiting as Cody digs into his pocket. When she turns back around, there's some color in her face.
It's my turn first. We each wrote out things to say to each other and as I recite something that has taken me months to come up with, I feel as if I'm only saying words, but like I had hoped, the look on her face tells me that they mean everything in the world. I get the okay from the man standing with us and I slide the ring onto her finger. When she speaks to me, I think she must have taken as much time as I have with writing it, but I know she probably didn't. She reads and she writes. She knows how to turn words into things that mean four different things at once and to make you understand them all at the same time. I glance behind her and see that both Erin and Jennifer are crying while Cody stands with a serious look on his face. I look back at Molly who has finished talking and now stands, looking at me while the man talks. She takes a deep breath and then slides the ring on my finger. I look at this man, done with all his talking, and wait for him to tell me what's next.
He only smiles at me. "Go on. Kiss your bride."
I have to bend down only slightly for our lips to meet.
She's warm and I can smell her perfume over the smell of the roses that are all around us. Her lips are soft and I can feel her nose brush against my skin just to the left of my nose. I hold her waist close to mine and I can feel her fingers pulling at my tux jacket.
