one day

twenty-two

a/n: so, i wasn't going to update, but someone asked me to touch on this topic, and i figured it fit well enough here, so why not? i hope i did your idea justice @HoneyAlacar!

There's a frantic knocking on the door, and it annoys Jaebeom immediately. He's not expecting visitors, he just wanted to work in peace, which is why he didn't tell anyone that he was going to his studio tonight. He didn't want to be found, wanted time alone, and he's ready to tell whomever is insisting entry that. But annoyance flies out the window once he opens the door and finds Seulgi there. She's bundled up in an oversized hoodie and sweatpants, nose red, and hair in her face. He wishes he can blame the colder weather, but judging by her eyes, she's been crying. "Hey... why are you here so late?" he asks carefully, moving aside to allow her entry. She takes a seat on the small couch in his studio, while he sits back at the desk, rolling over to her.

"I couldn't sleep."

"How come?"

"Bad dreams." Seulgi admits, rubbing at her nose. "I went to your apartment but you weren't there, so I texted Jinyoung, but he said you weren't with him... I figured you would be here."

"Yeah...just getting some work done." he shrugs, "Sleep here, I still have a bit that I want to do." he urges Seulgi to lie across the couch, putting his discarded jacket over her frame.

"Why are you working so late? You should be resting too." She tells him, "Especially after your V-Live."

"I'm not tired."

"Is it because of the netizens?" Seulgi asks quietly and Jaebeom looks at her carefully.

"What about them?"

"You can talk to me about it, you know... I'm here for you."

"You need rest, Seul."

"No, Jaebeom... what I need is for you to be honest with me. I need you to talk to me."

"What makes you think I have something to talk about?"

"Because you're willing to overwork yourself in this studio all night and keep insisting that I sleep because you want to be left alone. But I don't want to leave you alone. I want to support you, like you support me. If you're sad, or if you're upset, please talk to me about it."

"I don't want to burden you, you have enough on your plate."

Seulgi frowns, "But it's not a burden. Your happiness is my happiness too." Jaebeom sighs.

He doesn't want to come off as weak to his girlfriend. He doesn't want her to worry about something out of his control. He doesn't want her to worry about his mental health when hers is just as important. He doesn't need her to worry about what some fans are saying about this upcoming album. But he also... doesn't want to keep feeling like this. He doesn't want to feel guilty, or apologize for something he shouldn't have to feel sorry for.

"A few... are upset about my contributions to the new album."

"How come?"

"I helped with the title track... and then two more of my songs were chosen. They're upset that BamBam, Jackson, Mark, Youngjae... they don't have much credit. I understand why, I'm upset for them too. They make great music, have great lyrics, great stories behind those lyrics... but I don't pick which songs make it to the album. I, like them, pitch my ideas, and if they're chosen, I then fine tune them until JYP loves it. I've done so many songs for Got7 this year alone... and I hate that fans think I'm being favorited. It's not my fault."