Part 4

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All night I desperately looked for Brooke. Finally, when I thought to look in her room, her maids said she didn't want to see me. What did I do wrong?

So I decide to see Breanne instead.

Knocking on her door, I call, "Breanne! It's Prince Gerad."

She opens the door within a few seconds, grinning. "Hi!" she says happily.

I frown. "We need to talk." Looking at her maids I add, "In private, please."

They nod, scurrying out of the room. Breanne sits down on the edge of her bed, furrowing her eyebrows. "G- Prince Gerad, what's wrong?"

"Gerad," I say irritably. "Call me Gerad. And Silvia has told me some things about you."

The smile immediatley sags. "Oh," she says, blushing. "I can explain."

"I'm sure you can. Start talking." I don't know where this anger is coming from.

"W-Well I-"

"Stop with the stuttering. I know it's fake."

She gasps. "W-What?"

"It's fake," I spit. "You're lying to me about this, all of this!" 

She looks at me, shocked. "Lying about what, exactly?" she yells. "You have no right to say that! You have no idea who I am and what I'm like! You think you know everything, Prince Gerad, but the thing is, you know nothing about me! So just shut up already! Send me home! See if I care!" She runs out of the room, going who knows where. And for me, being as furious as I am, need to go outside and think things through.

What is it that I'm doing wrong? Both Brooke and Breanne are mad at me. I can understand Breanne, but what I don't get is what I did to hurt Brooke. Is she even mad? Well, she must be, because she didn't want to see me. But... I didn't do anything... did I?

I walk out to the gardens and sit on the cool bench, the wind sending shivers down my spine.

Now that I'm thinking about it, I'm not mad about what Breanne said. Because it's true. Every word that came out of her mouth is true. But she was avoiding my accusations. I still don't know if I'm right.

Maybe, maybe not. At this point, does it matter?

I mean, it's only within the first week of the Selection.

We have time to forgive and forget.

So... I need to forgive.

Which I do.

So for now, Breanne's staying here.

And so is Brooke.

And Sadie. The girl who crashed Brooke's date with Amberly. She's grown on me since then. We've talked since then, and she's just the most amazing girl. She can make me smile easily and always brings a peaceful prescence to the room. She would be an amazing queen.

On the other hand, Breanne is the opposite. She's so passionate and free willed, as I've been told. I admire that, of course, but that isn't something that makes a good ruler. She would be too easily upset in my position, I can already tell.

And then Brooke, she could easily be a queen. She's just too fragile and too easily broken. I would need to toughen her up first. But she's very sweet and kind and fair. All good qualities that I love. 

None of the other girls really stick out at me. Most of them try too hard, or don't try hard enough. They try to act natural but they end up acting stupid. Some of them are pretty, or funny, or really sweet, but not enough.

Maybe I'm picky.

But is that a bad thing?

I sigh as I breath in the cold air sharply. There's a rustle in the bushes.

Someone pops out of the bush nearest me and I immediatley pull out my gun and aim it at the figure in front of me. 

My vision is blurry but the figure is obviously a girl. I don't put the gun down even though I know I should.

The girl takes a deep breath. "Prince Gerad," she whispers, a voice as smooth as silk. "It's me, Sadie. Hello?"

My eyes widen and I put the gun down. "Jesus, Sadie. I'm sorry. I thought you were a rebel."

She laughs. "It's okay. But does that mean I look dangerous?" She raises an eyebrow and giggles.

I chuckle and move closer to her. "Maybe."

"I don't bite," she whispers, looking up at me and smiling.

Not thinking at all, I lean over to kiss her.

To my despair, she dodges my kiss. "Gerad, what are you doing?" she whispers.

"I-I um, d-don't know... I-I thought..." My face turns deep red. Now I know why girl blush so much.

"I'm sorry," I whisper and walk briskly out of the garden, shaking my head as I go.

What got into me?

And why wouldn't Sadie kiss me?

I didn't know I was that into Sadie. I thought I would try to kiss Breanne first, or maybe Brooke. But Sadie? I guess she's in my top three...

Sighing, I enter my room and collapse onto my bed. It's only the first week.

What the hell was I thinking?

I knew I was going to make a fool of myself.

Suddenly someone barges into my room. I furrow my eyebrows and then I realize it's Amberly.

"Amberly, I don't want to talk right now. Go away." I put my head under the pillow.

"Oh come on Gerad. What's wrong?" She sits at the edge of my bed.

"Three girls. My favorites at this point. They all hate me."

She laughs. "Girls? Hating you? That's a good joke."

"It's not funny," I say flatly. 

"Okay." She becomes serious. "Who are they and why do they hate you?"

"Breanne. Brooke. Sadie." She nods as I say each name. 

"Ooh. Sadie is so awesome. Breanne is very moody. And Brooke is too sensitive."

"Yeah. I've realized that. Okay, so I tried to kiss Sadie."

"WHAT?!" she exclaims, jumping up. "You are already kissing people? Jesus, Gerad!"

"Yeah... and she totally denied me. I don't know if she's mad at me, but now things are definitley more awkward between us." I sigh.

"It's okay. You'll figure things out. That's just like you. You don't give up until it's over."

I nod. "And Breanne... I accused her of lying to me about her personality. Which I still believe myself to be true."

She laughs. "I'm sure you're right. Don't bother with her."

I pout. "But I really like her. I felt something with her right away. I think we're almost the same. She's trying to cover up who she really is, and sometimes so am I."

"If you say so... whatever. But what did you do to Brooke?"

I shrug. "I don't really know. After you interrupted our date, she ran away. And she didn't want to see me tonight when I came looking for her."

Amberly sighs. "I'm sorry Gerad. I'll help you out as much as I can."

"But don't embarrass me or ruin anything, okay?"

"Okay."

I smile. "Thanks."

"Anytime, Bro." She pats my shoulder and walks out of my room.

Maybe I need to look at the world more like Amberly does.

More kindness.

Less...

everything else.

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