Toxic Love (Completed)

Chapter 38: The Past Is In The Past, and Nothing He Has Done Matters

"Are you sure this is what you want? If we start, there is no turning back. I'd rather not have you pissed off at me later on in the future, regretting this." Xander asked me.

"I want this, I swear I do," I reassured him. This was it. I was making my final decision in life. No turning back now.

I didn't know it at the time, but this one little session with Xander would change everything. I was stupid for not thinking about this even more.

But after seeing him in the club with that girl, it made me go mad. I felt like it was wrong was I was feeling. I was feeling jealousy.

Which I shouldn't be since I was dating Joey...

Joey...

My boyfriend...

The guy I'm supposed to be in love with. He's normal. Yes, he may be associated with a drug lord, but at least he isn't one.

But Xander is Xander...

He's something I've wanted for a long time. I've put the past behind me, and up until now, nothing he has done matters.

"I love you, Megan, please don't forget that," Xander whispered. I think he thought I wouldn't hear him, but I did.

I looked him into the eyes, and saw two things,

lust

and

love.

I smiled at him before grabbing his shirt and pulling him down into a longing and well-needed kiss.

2 Hours Earlier

"I can't believe he just let us in!" Staci said shocked.

I laughed in disbelief. The bouncer from the door didn't even look at our IDs. Which were completely fake. I mean, I'm only 17. Staci and her friend Libby are both 19.

"Let's just be fucking grateful," Libby said as we walked into the main clubbing room. It was filled with about 75 people dancing and grinding on each other.

Which seemed like the perfect environment for how drunk I was about to get.

We all walked over toward the bar and Libby ordered us all a martini which I drank quite quickly.

"Slowly down, don't waste it," Staci commented as she saw me finishing off the martini.

I rolled my eyes and asked the bartender for another without even thinking about the consequences.

The drinks were helping in about 1000 different ways. They were helping me forget, and they were getting me more loose. I needed to forget things tonight.

I guess if I'm being honest with myself, I need to forget somebody. Not something.

"Do you want to go and dance? One of my favorite songs just came on." Staci asked both me and Libby.

Libby got up from the bar stool and nodded. I shook my head no, and they both walked out onto the dance floor without me.

I needed more to drink before I started dancing. As I said earlier, drinking would help me loosen up. And that's what I needed.

I turned back to the bartender, and asked for four more shots. All for me, I was not in the mood for sharing.

After about four more shots, I felt more loose. I felt like I could just go out and dance floor, and dance for hours. And that's what I wanted, to dance. I got a friend a barstool, stumbling on my own 2 feet.