the secret » david dobrik au

E I G H T

"I don't even want to wake them up. That's so adorable."

Whoever was trying to whisper was not doing a good job of it. It was way too early, and the curtains on the windows were open, and the sun was seeping through, and all I wanted was ten more minutes of sleep.

"Hey, Ev? Wake up! We need to evacuate before anyone makes us help clean up," that was Corinna's voice, so I guess Natalie was the one that didn't want to wake us up.

"You guys are bitches," David mumbled, his voice much deeper and filled with sleep. "She's actually a good sleeper."

"What does that mean?" I sat up, pulling his arm off of me and rubbing my sleepy eyes.

"You don't move or make noises," David chuckled. "You're like a rock."

"Oh," I blushed, wiggling my way out of the bed and to my feet. I slipped my shoes back on and glanced at the boy who was still laying on the bed, staring at me. "Thanks for letting me sleep in here. Sorry that we're not gonna help you clean up."

He shrugged, "It's expected at this point. I'll probably see you guys later."

"Catcha later, Dobrik!" Natalie grabbed my wrist and yanked me out of the room, sending David an over the shoulder wave. Corinna shut his bedroom door behind us and we descended the staircase. We had to step over a few bodies in the living room, but we eventually made it to the front door. I had survived my first frat party. I had actually made it out alive. I felt like celebrating. "That was the cutest thing I've ever seen."

"What was?" I looked around to see what she was talking about. I saw no one, except some boys on the lawn of the next house who were giving us evil eyes like we were the spawns of Satan for doing the "walk of shame", even though I had nothing to be ashamed of.

"You and David! Are you kidding?" she looked at me like I'd grown three heads. "You slept in a bed together, and you're telling me you don't like him... even a little bit?"

"No," I sighed in confusion. "I don't know what goes on in your heads, but I can talk to the male species without being interested in them."

"Are you gay, Evan?" Corinna frowned, then quickly added, "I mean, it's totally fine if you are. We won't judge. We'll find you someone to date!"

"I'm not gay," I laughed at their inability to comprehend that you could be attracted to boys and simultaneously not be attracted to every boy. "I'm just not interested in David. Or anyone right now, for that matter. I'm trying not to date, remember?"

"I just don't get it," Natalie shook her head at Corinna. "Whatever. You have fun being a Virgin Mary."

"She's crankier when she's hungover, if you can't tell."

I could tell. The girls both looked like complete messes, shirts on backwards or crooked and makeup smeared in all different directions. I wasn't sure if that was attributed to the sex they both had last night or the large amount of alcohol consumed in a short amount of time, but they looked rough.

We walked all the way back in peace after that. Corinna told us about her hookup with Jeff, and Natalie stayed relatively quiet, only telling us that she "slept on Todd's floor".

I didn't know about the other two girls, but after grabbing a cinnamon sugar Poptart from the cabinet, I immediately went into hibernation and slept most of the day, only leaving the bed when Natalie informed me that she made us mac and cheese.

It was a chill day in the apartment. After dinner, I showered and spent the rest of the night watching horror movies in my bed.

The next week was more of the same. I went to class, had lunch sometimes with my new friend Zane, came home, cooked something, and went to bed. It felt nice to have a routine going. I would never consider myself a spontaneous or adventurous person, so having a schedule helped me focus.

The only thing that really changed was David. They still came over three or four nights a week, and now, while Natalie was with Todd, David would get in my bed and sleep with me. Todd started staying much later, and the boys would leave right before Corinna woke up.

They reasoned with me that if they were to get caught still in the apartment the next morning, they could use me as a cover. David had already admitted he liked sleeping with me, and where was Todd supposed to sleep while David slept with me?

I still felt like a terrible person keeping all of that from Corinna, but what was I supposed to do? People were going to be hurt either way.

It was the next weekend that everything went downhill for me. One of Corinna and Natalie's old high school teachers was getting married, and they got invited to attend, so they were gone for the weekend.

I was never great at being alone.

I went to the store to get some premade cookie dough, and that's when I smelled it. It was the stupid fucking warm vanilla sugar smell from Bath and Body Works, and instantly, memories came flooding back.

"Oh, finally," Aunt Lydia was sitting on our front porch steps, a blanket around her shoulders and makeup smeared down her face. "My babies. My poor babies."

"What? What the fuck is going on?"

I was just sixteen at the time. I had only just gotten my driver's license, and I chose to drive me and Simon to the toy store to get some game he wanted. We ended up stopping a few more places. We had only been gone for an hour.

I didn't expect to pull up to a house surrounded by cop cars.

"Where's Maddie?" Simon asked. He was so young. His hand was gripping mine tightly. He probably didn't understand anything fully, but he could tell that whatever situation we were in, it wasn't good.

Upon the mention of her name, Lydia burst into tears. She said, "she's gone. Maddie is gone, and so is your mom."

Tears were falling so fast I couldn't control them. Simon asked, "what do you mean, gone? When are they coming back?"

"SimSim," my heart broke at his words, and I picked him up to hug him to my body. "I don't think they're coming back, buddy."

"Your mom..." Lydia shook her head like she couldn't believe the story. "She was drinking... I don't know. I don't know. They think she had some type of mental break. Mads was trying to stop her. She was trying so hard. The 911 people said they could hear her fighting."

I couldn't even process it. My mom had been an uncaring and detached alcoholic since our dad left us for another family with a much younger woman, but she never seemed crazy. She only seemed hurt. I never imagined she'd kill my little sister.

"It would've been me," I told Lydia. "God, if we didn't go to get that stupid fucking game, I could've stopped it. I could've stopped it. Lyd, I would've saved her."

"Oh, no, Evangeline," she wrapped her arms around the both of us, her tears soaking the collar of my shirt. "There's nothing you could've done to stop this. Absolutely nothing."

"It could've been me," I cried into her shoulder. "It should've been me. She must've been so fucking scared. She was alone and scared and I let her die."

"Now, Evan—"

I stopped listening at that point. Nothing she could've said would've convinced me otherwise.

It was when they were taking the bodies out that it hit me that my little sister was really dead at the hands of my mother. Although she was covered in a thin white sheet, Maddie reeked of her favorite scent, warm vanilla sugar.

Wow . Thats a shocker . I mean not for me but hopefully for u guys

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Xoxo abby