Perfectly Fragile

Chapter Twenty Four

I don't think I'd ever truly realised the extent of the emotional scars Jackson had skillfully imbedded into my heart. Until now.

Like the curtain sealing them away had dropped to reveal the true damage he had inflicted. I'd never admitted it or excepted that he was the first person to steal a part of my stole.

No mercy given,he took it and kept an iron grip in it. Achieving what I believed was the impossible.

In this moment I felt like I was unravelling naked, bare, completely exspoed. Tears fell freely from my eyes, but I held no shame. It was like an outer body experience. For most of my life I've been cramped into my hard back shell. But right now I was soaring out of it. Breaking free of the barriers the wolves had created.

Finally, i embraced my fears and followed my painfully broken heart. It wasn't like the outburst I'd had with, the alpha, the pack, the silver beast and the beta. Because all of them times I'd given up.

Inside my heart had stopped my fire burnt out and my mind numb. That wasn't the case as I confronted the monster before me. My heart pounder but not of fear out of truth. My body shook but not because of anxiety but through complete determination.

Silence had cast over the walls of tress surrounding us. I'd expected Jackson to become angry and lash out into a rageful storm. But instead I heard the sigh that left lips. It sounded mostly defeated maybe even worn. Like a white flag was being wove between us as he let go of the monster for a moment.

"you have no idea what it's like being me, for a moment I want the pressure to disappear so I can choose who I want to be... Instead I'm bound by the commands of another and Im...

His words trailed of as he took another deep breath in. His voice was like nothing I'd ever heard before it was completely broken. My heart hurt for him I couldn't help it. For the first time since he betrayed me I saw the same boy who had won my trust. Lost broken and scared.

But I couldn't and wouldn't show him the the sympathy and support I naturally wanted to give him.

"no one can decide who you are but you. The boy I first met knew that."

It was a long shit but I wanted him to remmeber the time we had spent together. He had gotten to know me more than anyone had ever knew me. But then he played the biggest part in making me loose myself. I wanted him to see the person he could of been.

" I'm sorry"

Words I'd never though I'd hear from the infamous betas son. The cruel puppet aloha had sewn tightly to together. I'd dreamt many of times of what it would be like for someone to actually say it to me.

I thought it would be liberating maybe even freeing. Instead an ugly wave of emotion seemed to wash over me. I wanted to wrap up the words and throw them at him. I didn't want or need his apology. Forgiveness was apart of me my nature had never changed. But I wouldn't forget.

Everything was Ingraved in my mind and would be for the rest of my life. I did however feel pity for Jackson though. I couldn't help it,I felt pity for the boy who turned into a monster, the empty lost person he has turned out to be. Because he could of been so much more.

"me to"

I truly meant it I was sorry for him, I had lived with endless suffering and I wouldn't wish it in anyone. Now I'm battling my biggest demons daily. Myself.

"look brey...

Jackson words abruptly ended as he began to sniff the air around us. Letting out a small non threatening growl out of annoyance. I was left wondering what was going on and what he was about to say. The gently buzzing in my head began to sound before the silver beasts silky voice entered my mind.

"breya are you ok?"

His voice seemed a little frantic as is fast pace words sounded in my head.

"im fine, is colby OK?"

"I'm fine breya just teaching your of the rails alpha who is in charge"

The humor in the betas voice wasn't surprising. Sure he could be this grueling seriously scary wolf. But I was starting to realise he was more of a lighthearted person. Someone I've yet to ever come across. It was without a doubt refreshing. I wouldn't however like to get on his bad side because I have a strong feeling about him being relentless.

Dragged quite litterly back into the present Jackson was dragging me gently through the woods.

"where are you breya?"

Wolfs voice bounced around the walls of my mind but I couldn't focus on answering him right away. Jackson pace only seemed to increase as he dragged me aimlessly through the bare trees.

"in the forest with Jackson, he is acting.... Odd"

"question him"

I spent a few minutes trying to figure out what I was actually going to ask him. Mentally debating if I should or not. He seemed agitated, making him unpredictable. Suckingnin my self doubt I gently spoke towards Jackson.

"Jackson where are we going?"

He didn't answer me he jsut seemed to pick up the pace more. My wobbly legs nearly falling underneath me finding it hard to keep up.

"please Jackson please slow down"

Turnjgn around whilst keep a firm grip on my arm. My eyes were met with his face. His nose flaring and is eyes frantic. Brining his face inches from mine he spoke dangerously low.

"keep moving breya, if we don't then their going to...

I flinch as he let out what sounded between a grunt and scream in complete frustration. Letting go of my arm his reached his sturdy arms up to his head. Both hands shaking it out. Befrkre grabbing both my arms making me suck in a breath out of surprise and pain from the pressure he was applying to my already injured arm.

"we can't stay here we need to get you in the pack house. I've given you every reason not to trust me. But right now you need to find faith in me breya."

He seemed utterly desperate, and for the first time in a long time I seen concern whirl  in his usually ice cold eyes. He was practically pleading with me to believe him despite the little information he gave me. But it was none of that, that made me say.

" ok Jackson "

It was because I saw something I thought I'd never see again.