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The Trauma

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It has been a week since you woke up from a long sleep. From what you learnt... you had ten years of blank memory. You had no idea what happened. You tried to recall but every time you did, your head hurts like a little bomb exploding from the inside. The pain was so severe you would give up.

The handsome doctor whom you now know was called Jin, came and check on you several times a day. He keeps telling you to give yourself time to recover, and tells you bits and pieces of your past. He also told you were caught in an accident which you don't even remember and that was what caused your memory loss.

But the strange thing is, you were not hurt. At least no physical injury that you are aware of.

You guessed, something happened. Something bad happened and that was what caused you to want to forget everything and start over. You were not sure if Jin was unaware of what it was, or he was keeping it a secret from you.

One thing that you have been doing a lot since you woke up, besides reading and catching up with the world is, looking into the mirror.

You find yourself dazing into the mirror watching an older version of yourself whom you are familiar with and yet at the same time feeling so distant with.

"What happened to you?" You asked your reflection although you knew it was not a question your mirror image could answer. But still, you hoped you had an answer. You hoped someone had an answer.

In fact, you were in dilemma whether you want your memories back. On one side, you wanted to know what happened. You wanted to know what kind of life you are living. Besides, having to live your life with ten blank years of memory will just be difficult. You also wanted to know the reason why the future you chose to forget everything. You were curious.

But on the other hand, you knew yourself. You chose this because it was the only way, or the best way. Do you want to doubt your own decision? Is this really for the best?

And every time, it comes back to the same question. Do you really want your memories back? Because you think your future self wanted this for you.

There was a knock on the door which snapped you out of your thoughts. Considering that there were normally only two people who came by and Jin has already made his visit a while ago, it had to be another.

"Come in, Tae." And the door slid open. Taehyung lifted a white rectangular box in his hand and you recognized it immediately. Taehyung brought you your favourite donuts.

"Y/N? How are you feeling today." Taehyung asked with a wide smile. Actually, you were feeling fine and you really wanted to discharge and go outside. See how much the world has changed. "Actually I feel like going out."

"No." Taehyung reacted bluntly instantly changing his smiling face into a frown.

"Why? The world is full of radiation?" You protested, if the world was such a dangerous place, the news would have broadcasted something. Taehyung was just being over protective.

"You need to recover first." Taehyung said. He placed the donuts on the table and sighed. He patted your head like a little puppy.

"Tae..." You nearly begged him. You are tired of staying indoors. You only went to rehab and back to the ward. And the only people you talked to was Jin and Taehyung and some random nurses. Besides that, Taehyung has been acting extremely weird around you.

You guessed that it has something to do with the history that you have forgotten. And from observation, you knew he did not want to talk to you about it. You tried to test him but he would just redirect the message somewhere else. You knew him long enough to understand that you cannot make him talk unless he wanted to. Which made you wonder, were you not in a relationship with him anymore?