Taming Your Heart

Seventeen: Pain

Serene's Pov:

I know it's wrong..but i can't control myself, when it comes to him. I tried really hard to not think about him or imagining the possibilities with him.

About an hour ago, i thought I'm doing that so much better, and than...one look in his eye and everything crashed down. He is all i wanted all i need.
I could've easily denied the manager, and walked away. But i didn't. I cannot play hard around him even though i wanted. He has this much effect on me and it makes me nervous. But i need to control myself and do the right thing.

"are you coming inside or you gonna stand there whole night?" he asked.

Without letting me answer, he grabbed my wrist and led me inside his penthouse. Its too big and lavish than my tiny apartment. I remember the last time i was hear....was the best memories of my life.

"what do i have to do ,SIR?" i asked. I don't know how will he react, i mean I'm here as a waitress not like his...gf or friend...

"Sit here! Renne" he said patting next to him on the couch.

"I don't think its appropriate for a waitress to sit next to you Sir!" i said politely with my fake accent.
I like pushing buttons and teasing him is my favorite hobby i guess.He stared at me with distaste.

"Renne..do not challenge my patience. I don't mind pulling you here in my lap..choice is yours"

Goosebumps arise on my whole body, from hearing his stern voice only. As much as i love it, i hate that he's having this much effect on me. I quietly sat besides him. I can feel his intense gaze on me.

" Why you doing this to me?" he whispered. I can feel the pain in his voice. I did,hurt him so bad.

"I'm not doing anything to you, Sir!" i replied.

"I like the way you call me 'Sir'...but not you as a waitress...i want you as Renne " he said. I can't help this, he's making this situation much more difficult for me.

"What you want Lucas? Why you playing mind games with me"

"I'm not playing any games with you Renne...its you. You are playing with my feelings. I want my answers" he replied and rested his hand on my knee.
I choke on my breath, this is what happens when you do not stick to your plans.
I am staring at his hand resting on my knee. Maybe if he raise his hand a little up on my thigh and place his big hand over my...... Shutt up Renne...my pervert thoughts aren't helping.

"I don't understand..what answers" my own voice felt foreign to my ears.

"Why didn't you unblocked me yet? I told you everything and still you didn't trust me but you believe that fucking trash news"

"I trust you Lucas. I do. But i do not trust myself. I'm not good to be around someone like you. I know what i did was so unfair and I am so sorry for that" i finally made eye contact with him. I said,

"If i was you, i would never wanted to see me again, ever. And i know i deserve this punishment. I was so insecure about you that i fucked up everything we had. I mean our friendship. So i think its better if i keep my distance. I'm sorry" my voice cracked as tear rolled down on my cheeks.

He wiped my cheeks with his thumb, and caresses my cheeks.

"But i am not you...i still want you like i wanted before. You are so much more than i ever deserve in my life. I'm more fucked up than you. I should've taken it more seriously, than i did. I promise i will take care of this as much as i can. You will never have to deal with shit like that,again " and pulled me into his arms.

I couldn't hold my tears and all the guilt I'm caring, i rested my head on his chest. Letting me melt in his strong arms..inhaling his masculine cologne, that drives me insane and calms my mind. He is my pain and he is my cure

Lucas pov:

Her muffled cries lost, in my chest. she's clutching my shirt tightly like a frightened child. Her eyes are red and swollen. Her nose and cheeks are in a slight pink shade and covered in Black streaks of smeared mascara.

"Renne, is there anything you want to tell me?" i asked her, still rubbing her back soothingly. I think there is much more than this, something terrible.

"No..its just that i am so fucked up. I am not good for anyone"

"Why do you think so..who told you this crap" i couldn't help the anger i felt.

"I know about myself. I am the worst option to be picked. Thats why i left alone. Everyone i loved ever, is either died or run away. I wish i was dead either, but i have to keep my promise" she replied.

"Tell me about it. you'll feel better this way, Baby" i kissed her forhead.

She closed her teary eyes ,letting the tears fall on my chest. Heavily breathing , controlling her sobs.

"Four years ago, my brother died this same day. It still felts like yesterday, i can't forget it. I was so careless, he told me so many times that he needs me. I told i was busy and cannot visit him. Than one day i received a text from him, that "I love you my baby sister...and i do know..you will take care of her. Tell HERA,i loved her..more than my own life". I was confused,that who is Hera..." she paused whimpering.
I rubbed her back and patted her head on my chest. Its the first time, she let me in her life. I won't pressurize for more.

"when i reached there, i found Hera wrapped in a blanket,and a letter. From that day to the end of my life, i will keep her as my first priority. She is my only hope to be alive. My brother's last promise to be kept....and my life" .
I felt her warm tears spill over my chest. I don't want her crying...but its what she needed. She suffered a lot..and it becomes severe, when you can't even express your emotions.

She sniffled ,and raised her head from my chest,tucking a strand of hair on behind her ear.

"Are you alright, Baby?"  i asked.

She nodded and looked around. Then fixing her gaze on my chest.

"I ruined your shirt too. I shouldn't be near any guy when crying" she smiled.

"Its black and the least i could care...and what about that shirt thing..?? I questioned. I'm curious to know. Maybe jealous?.

" ohh that Noah's...Mrs.Briana's son. He is a nice guy he asked me why i was sad...and than this happened. You know him right, he was there on Hera's birthday" she replied.

I don't know why...but i do not feel good to hear this from her. I met that guy..and i notice the way he was staring at her. The whole time he was flirting with her. I was about to punch his face, but controlled myself.

"Yeahh i remember. Are you hungry,love?" i asked. I dont want to hear about any other guy from her.

"Yes!! But if you dont mind... Can i have a shower before..!" hesitation was clear in her voice.

"You don't need my permission,Renne. You can do anything you want here....with me" i winked.

She chuckled, and her face gone red.

"Thank you...I'll take a quick shower and than help you in the kitchen" she said and paced towards the spare bedroom, where she slept the last time.

I grabbed a dark green sweat shirt and black sweat pants for her. She didn't have her clothes, she is wearing that short waitress dress with the club's logo. I placed the clothes over the bed and left the room.
I still have so many questions, but that can wait. I can wait for the right time, and I'll surely get the answers then.

Heyy!!
Any suggestions??

Next chapter is going to be a little more sensual...

Do vote and comment pls..