Sapphire's Review Store 3.0

Review by Faye: The Beast, The Beauty and The Castle

Title: The Beast, The Beauty and The Castle

Author: Izzybell_180

Reviewer: Fayesther

Blurb: 5/5

I have no qualms with the blurb, it is short and punchy and it includes a good snippet of information to spark an interest in your reader.

You made good use of open questions to lead your reader into the themes of your story.

It was also really nicely laid out on the page and easy to follow. Good job.

Writing Style: 3/5

I love your writing style! You bring wonderfully clear descriptions and your scene transitions are so smooth! Reading your story felt like watching a movie in my mind! The pacing was perfect, I could follow everything as I read and no information got lost.

The way you ended chapters pretty much forced me to keep scrolling! A brilliant use of cliff-hangers throughout!

I loved how you wrote dialogue. You took advantage of this storytelling tool to bring a number of aspects to your tale. It brought out each character's personalities effectively, moved the story forward and explained world building folklore. Nothing said felt contrived or out of place.

Writing out numbers looks more formal than using digits.

The way you build suspense within your story is mind blowing! You have a talent that I totally seek to learn within my own writing! You tease your reader with a glimpse of what your story could be. However, you do not give everything away all at once after you do so. You let the excitement drip through steadily throughout. You hold back when its needed and you show your reader a quick glance to make them crave to see what else you have in store.

I would like to mention that the first chapter of the book doesn't really match the rest of the book. It is full of telling rather than showing and doesn't do your story justice as an introductory chapter! (I'll discuss this further in the "plot" section).

Also a little nit-pick, when writing numbers within prose, I tend to avoid using digits; writing numbers out in word form looks much better on the page. Also, there are a quite a few recurring grammatical errors throughout.

Characterisation: 5/5

Your characters are so vividly portrayed I now see Ana, Azrael and Darcy as part of my extended family! They jump out of the page! You even brought a puppy completely to life within your writing, and seeing as he could not talk that shows no easy feat!

I adore Ana and I was on her side right from the get go! She is a delicate individual, who is so obedient and so strong! She reminded me of a Disney Princess. It was fascinating to see how such an innocent being could be part of such a dark and cruel world. I loved how she didn't allow it to influence her at all! She only looked for the beauty within moments that fleeted by her. What a beautiful soul! I really appreciate the fact that you didn't write her as a "know-it-all" character. Instead she pulls from her observations and tries her best to piece together her ideas about the world around her. This was so refreshing to see and it made her character so relatable.

Darcy, as you already know, is my favourite character! For being the weakest character physically (only human) she is the strongest in spirit! She stands up to monsters and she is protective over Ana. It was clear from the get go that Ana NEEDED Darcy and so did I! I never got tired of her character. In a lot of stories side character or sidekicks can get tiresome, not this one! She is the best and her friendship with Ana felt so real.

Azrael is a very complex character. Starting off as just awful! He made me so uneasy to begin with and I did not trust him whatsoever. The way you expressed his gradual personality changes as he interacted more and more with Ana was heart rendering! I am a sucker of an anti-hero story and he is the perfect anti-hero! (His relationship with Bear has to be the cutest thing I have ever read!)

Ana's family and Henry made me so angry and disgusted me to the core! I want nothing more than those monsters to meet their end! Such brilliant villains! I am actually scared of Ana's father. Any scene with that cruel beast in made me cower inside!

Christopher was an interesting character too! Being introduced later on didn't cause any problems within letting the reader get to know him as well as the others. I couldn't help but root for him and Ana as well as Ana and Azrael. Love triangle stories are always a hit with me! Especially when the chemistry between characters is written as well as it is in this story.

Plot: 4/5

Okay! Within the first chapter, I felt that there was a lot of information being communicated all at once and not enough character interactions or drama to wet the appetite for your story. For me the story started at chapter two! I think it would benefit your story if you made chapter one an epilogue and wrote the scene of Ana's birth. I think that'll be a cool way to introduce various aspects of the world you're introducing and in a way that would start your story off with a bit of drama.

Your story moves effortlessly through Ana's life – leading up to her twenty-first birthday. (I appreciated how you allowed the reader to track the time span of the story, you added this information in so subtly).

Ana's innocence and being an outcast in a dark world is built up brilliantly within the first few chapters. She is surrounded by cruelty, yet she has kept pure. I was interested to see how such a gentle individual was going to carry herself around such a monstrous family and strangers. A great set up of tough situations for her to face to really hook your reader in.

You brought brilliant ideas that build a fascinating world for your story to take place in. Finding out about vampire bloodlines, witches' bloodlines and various types of vampires and monsters. As well as family politics was so great to read! You communicated this information incredibly well!

The plot of this story is like none that I have ever come across before! It is full of great ideas. With world building folklore explained vividly. Relatable character arcs, heart rendering romance and scenes of utter horror! I appreciate that you didn't glamorise the vampires' life style at all. Their cruelty set my teeth on edge and I wanted Ana to escape that awful life!

OVERALL SCORE: 17/20 

This story never dips in excitement. The ultimate page turner! If this was a television show I would've binged it in one night, putting off going to bed to watch "just one more!"

It is in need of an edit, with recurring grammar errors here and there, but the incredible ideas within the story more than make up for that. If you worked through it and ironed out the blunders you'll have a true masterpiece on your hands!

Thank you so much for asking me to review this binge story! I certainly plan to read any others in the series. (I mean, I have to!)

I hope you found my feedback helpful.