Her Biker Baby Daddy

Chapter 39

Talia POV

Everyone left and we put Prince down for the night. He slept peacefully in his bassinet next to my bed. Ryder sat on the other side of me and we sat in silence, just staring at one another.

I knew we needed to talk and I knew we couldn't move past anything without this talk. It's taken a lot in me to sit here and prepare for everything. I had a million things going through my head. I was think if he would leave me. If he hated me because Leo got to Leslie and I failed from protecting her. If he blames me for anything.

"I know what your thinking, Talia. None of this is your fault." He said as he broke me out of my train of thought and I just frowned his way. "What happened to you is not your fault. If it's anybody's fault, it's mine." I shook my head at him, "No it's..." he cuts me off, "Just listen to me, please."

He grabs my hands in his, "Talia why happened to you isn't your fault. It's my fault and I didn't protect you. You could of died in the hands of Leo. I never wanted you to be apart of this, I never wanted to risk you or our sons life. You were kidnapped, tortured, and hurt all because a man wanted information about me and my club. I put your life at risk and I don't think I can ever forgive myself for that. It will always be stuck in the back of my mind. I could of lost you and I don't think I could live with myself if that happened. The moment you were kidnapped, my whole world fell apart. I didn't stop looking for you. I stopped eating, taking care of club business and only focused on finding you and Leslie. When four weeks passed and you still wasn't here with me, I felt like I was losing my mind."

She stood up and turned with his back to me, "I felt like I was dying. I felt like I was losing you and my son. I felt like I was losing myself." He turned back and faced me, "I know I have been a fucked up boyfriend and father during your whole pregnancy. I neglected you and my responsibility. I wasn't paying giving you the attention you needed. I missed the appointment we were going to find out the gender of our baby. Then I missed our gender reveal for goodness sake. I missed the most important moment we were support to share with, even after you reminded me. I have not been the man you needed me to be. I have not been the father you needed me to be. Even when you were mad at me, you never stopped from making sure I knew what was going on with our son. You never put me second, even when I put you second."

He walked back over to me and got on his knees, "You forgave me so many times, even when I didn't deserve it. I kept making mistakes but you still believed in me. I love you so fucking much and I never want to let you go. I will do better and prove to you that I can be the best man and father to you and Prince. I will prove to you every single day that you are the only woman I love. That you are the only woman I need. If I have to leave my position as Prez, then I will. As long I have you and our son, I don't need anything else."

My eyes widen when he said he would leave everything for me. Even though the club put me in a dangerous situation, would I make him leave something he was born to do. Ryder was a born leader. He was strong, passionate, and loyal when it came to this club. The club that took me in and made me feel like I finally belong somewhere. Made me feel like I wasn't alone and gave me a family. Yes, Rider made mistakes and those mistakes he made aren't easy to forget, it will take time for me to fully forgive him. I don't blame him for my kidnapping. He didn't tell Leo to kidnap me and beat me. He didn't tell Leo to try and get me to tell him about the club. Nah, that was all Leo, his greediness is what made him do that. Ryder is not at fault.

"Get up, please." I frowned. He looked at me for a second, "Please, Ryder?" I asked again and he did. I was already sitting up so I tapped the empty spot in front of him, motioning him to sit next to me. He does and I take his hands in mine.

"Ryder, none of this is your fault either. I was mainly thinking you were going to leave me because I didn't protect Leslie." I said, with tears in my eyes. Which made him gasp and gripped my face in his hands, "What do you mean you didn't protect Leslie? You did protect her. We seen videos of you protecting you. You did everything you can. My dad and I will forever be grateful for that. Leslie is fine and safe. When we first brought her home, she cried and cried and begged for you. She didn't want anybody but you. She would wake up crying for you. Like any normal five year old after a traumatic event like that. We would always have to bring her here so she could see you. So she could see that you were fine. It went on for two weeks, some night she would beg to sleep next to you and when she did, she slept peaceful. She was able to hear your heartbeat and that made her calm down. The moment you woke up, I knew she would be okay. So don't even say you didn't protect her because we all seen everything you did for her."