bestie anniv 2020

yoon haneul ;; network love .

" i found love where it wasn't supposed to be . "

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jaehyun stared at the thing before him , putting on his best disgusted expression . he instinctively inched away from it , wrinkling his nose at it .

" ... what is this ? "

haneul sighed . a long , long sigh of deep suffering .

" it's a carrot . "

" it can't be a carrot ! it looks so dirty ! it's not even orange ! also , why does it have leaves ? carrots don't have leaves ! and ... ew , why is it hairy ? "

" it's a fucking carrot , for god's sake ! they literally look like this ! the farmer plucked it out of the soil ! the brown dirty makes it look less orange ! leaves are for photosynthesis ! and have you never heard of root hairs ? god ! are you really that dumb ?! "

the ceo's expression darkened immensely at that last sentence .

" i'm not dumb . i'm just rich . "

" to the point where you don't know what a raw carrot looks like ? " haneul rolled her eyes , " i'd rather live in poverty , then . being rich is for the dumb . "

then she plastered her best customer service face on and asked for two kilos of carrots .

while the greengrocer was busy weighing out the carrots , she decided to give him a little iq test .

" what is this ? " she pointed to another vegetable . 

jaehyun hesitated for a moment . he probably didn't want to get called dumb again , so he gave the question some good thought before he submitted his final answer .

" ... lettuce ? "

haneul heaved another sigh . a longer , sadder sigh .

" it's a motherfucking eggplant . how the hell do you confuse the vegetable used in salads and the plant version of the d ?! "

" i told you ! i don't need to know all this ! "

" but how ?! you lived in america for four years ! you've gotta cook for yourself at some point ! "

" why cook for myself when i can just hire a housekeeper ? " his retort was innocent , but full of malice aimed at people of the lower class .

haneul rolled her eyes . secretly gave him the finger inside her sleeve . then she turned back , paid the man , thanked him , got her carrots , and went on her merry way .

as the couple made their way around the market , getting their fresh groceries , jaehyun decided to take the chance to learn about civilian life ( and annoy his girlfriend some more ) .

" what's this long green thing doing here ? "

" it's a cucumber . "

" what about this ? "

" chicken wings . "

" and this red thing here ? "

" salmon fillet . "

" what about this ? it looks like a roach . "

" those are prawns . "

" and these ? "

" potatoes ! god ! "

by the end of the trip , haneul's patience was already running thin . thinner than a sheet of paper . her hands were sore from carrying all the groceries and her ears were getting tired of listening to her boyfriend's corny jokes and questions about perfectly mundane stuff .

neither of them were surprised when she got angry , slamming the bags into the car boot and staying silent for the entire ride home .

and though she was still angry when she arranged the vegetables and meat into the fridge , jaehyun found her extremely cute . the way her lips pursed themselves together , her little frown , an occasional lip bite , and a very , very unthreatening glare every now and then .

in the end , after what seemed like an eternity , he finally asked , " why are you pissed that i don't know what a carrot looks like ? "

" because ! " she shoved a hunk of pork belly into the freezer and gave it a good smack , " reasons ! "

" aw , come on . " he couldn't hide his fond smile anymore .

out of the corner of her eyes , she saw him grinning like an idiot . it set her off like a bomb , and she launched into a rant without even stopping to processing the words .

" what ?! what's so funny ?! you think you're funny ? you think being uneducated on vegetables is funny ?! you think not knowing how a carrot looks like is funny ? you dependent fuck ! you absolutely man baby ! you abominable shit goblin ! you — "

curtesy of the rant , haneul had no time to dodge .

as jaehyun attacked her with a hug .

and a kiss .

and ...

" you're so cute when you get angry . " he whispered into her ear , giving it a gentle bite .

" now how about you show me these vegetables ... one by one ? "

[ note : this was supposed to be soft but i accidentally made it kinky in the last few sentences help ]