bestie anniv 2020

jang seulchae ;; better days .

" my life without you is like
a world without music . "

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chae walked down the road , freezing and lonely as ever , her windbreaker gently lifted by the wind , her hands stinging from the cold even though they were stuffed in her pockets . the tear streaks on her cheeks darted in and out of sight , almost invisible , just like the tightness in the corners of her pursed lips .

she looked down , not wanting to make eye contact with anyone else . she continued walking for a few more minutes , lost in her own thoughts , until , out of the corner of her eye , she noticed a man .

she noticed him standing in front of her , expression neutral but tinted with coldness and weariness that came with time . an oddly colourful , badly knitted scarf was draped around his neck , completely out of place with his monochromatic outfit that consisted of nothing except black and white . the hexagonal glasses perched on the bridge of his nose had tape and glue on its frame , evidence of its age and wear and how much he cherished it .

" h-hey , " she forced herself to wave at him , her tone bittersweet , her heart weighed down by am anchor in a void of remorse , " it's ... it's been a long time . "

" yeah , it ... it has , " seokmin replied with equal regret as well as a gentle sigh , " nice to see you again . "

" h-how are — "

" daddy ! "

before she could finish her sentence , a little girl came on her way , skipping down the road until she reached him and smoothly slipped her hand into his . he gently picked her up and put her on his shoulders , then smiled .

and that smile ... god . chae missed it so much . she missed it like the sun missed the moon and the the earth missed the sky . she missed how bright it was , how it could always make her day , how it never failed to give her the energy boost she needed , how it was her privilege to see it .

" you ... have a kid ? " she asked wistfully , " wow . "

" you're married too , aren't you ? " he gestured towards the wedding ring on her finger , " does he treat you well ? "

she nodded . " you ? is she ... nice ? "

" she is . not gonna lie , she reminds me of you . a lot . i thought i only got together with her just to forget you , but then i ... fell for her and ... well , i guess life has its plans for me . "

just then , the little girl began whining for him for him to put her down . seokmin gladly obliged , placing her back on the ground . he watched as she ran back across the road , back to the little playground outside her kindergarten to continue playing with her friends .

" she's cute , " chae smiled , " you must love her a lot . "

" defin— "

seokmin inhaled sharply when he noticed something else on her wrist . a good luck bracelet he remembered buying at a fortune teller's store , a simple red string with a soundless bell on it .

" you're still wearing this , " he noted , " do you ... still love me ? "

she ducked away , pulling her sleeve downwards in a feeble effort to conceal the bracelet . " n-no , i just — "

" you do ! " he exclaimed , grabbing her wrist , exposing the bracelet once more , " chae , i — "

before she could react , he pulled her into a hug , wrapping his arms around her in a warm embrace , his tone laced with urgency and late love .

" i love you too , okay ? you have no idea how much i missed you all these years ! i wish i could've stayed with you , i wish i could've been with you through all those ups and downs , but ... "

chae felt tears sting at the corners of her eyes when she heard those words . she hugged back tightly , finally speaking out the truth she'd held in for so long .

" you have no idea what i've been through for so long ! i missed you more than you could ever comprehend and i ... every fucking night , i just lie there thinking about how i could've changed things and we could've been together and nothing would've forced us apart , and ... and ... "

" it's okay , " seokmin reassured , " we can still be together . we can . it's not too late . "

" but how ? we're both married . we're tied down by family . society . our own lives . "

" we can run away , " he said firmly , determination sparkling in his eyes , " we can just go . what matters most is that we don't lose this chance again . getting to love each other means more than living a boring , repetitive life . come on , love — let's try this one last time . "

chae smiled , a single tear rolling down her cheek .

" ... alright . "

inside the playground , the little girl rolled her eyes . she sat herself onto a nearby swing and leaned over to talk to her classmate , pointing at the hugging couple on the road across from the kindergarten .

" mom and dad are acting up again . "