Apex Legends Oneshots! ❤

Flirting with an angel... Revenant x Pathfinder

For my Revfinder lovers, especially Ominus_Potato and Bandit_Brunsmeier

Plot: Revenant gets advice from Loba on how to flirt with Pathfinder, because he is a  s i m p. When he does flirt, things get interesting...

(A/N): Platonic Revenant x Loba. I want to try this out!

Revenant's POV

Am I really doing this?

Ugh, now I REALLY want to die.

Out of all the damn skinsuits who could help, it had to be Loba...

SHE is the reason I will never die...

I hate her, but for now...

She's going to help me...

I never thought this day would come...

Where I have to work with her outside these fucking games.

Every step I took closer to her room felt heavier and heavier, but that didn't stop me.

As I arrived at her door, I didn't bother to knock. After what's happened, Loba doesn't deserve privacy. I couldn't give a damn about what I walk into-

"GET OUT DEMONÍO! I'M CHANGING!" The girlie shouted at me. She was covering her bare chest, glaring at me.

I didn't listen, and just stayed in her room. "We need to talk, Loba..."

She pushed me away. "Can it wait? I don't need you of all people seeing me without a shirt!"

Right, humans don't like to be naked in front of others. That actually means something to them...pathetic...

"I couldn't care less if you weren't wearing anything." I snarled. "Clothing or not, I still see you as the same skinsuit who took away my chance to finally die..."

Loba growled, and started putting on her shirt. "Well, isn't that sweet?" Her tone was sarcastic. I did a good job of making her angry~

Then she finished dressing herself, and stepped closer to me. "So what do you want now, demonío? Are you going to threaten me again?!"

I sighed, "If I wanted to come here, I would have already killed you..."

The girlie grabbed her silver staff, pointing it at me. "Get to the point, Revenant!"

"I need you to help me." Damn, I hated saying that. "It's not about my source code, it's about...Pathfinder..."

She raised an eyebrow. "The appliance?"

I growled, and yelled, "Don't call him that!"

She giggled, that stupid, annoying giggle. "Ah, what about him? You want to ruin his life too?"

"...No, I need your advice on how to..." God, I'm killing myself after this.

"Flirt with him?" Loba predicted.

What? She knew? "How did you know-"

The shorter female began laughing, "Oh demonío, I have been trying to kill you for years. I've learned so much about you, and seen how you treat the others. But Pathfinder? Awh, I think you care about him deep down~ I didn't know a heartless monster could love at all...Especially one that killed my family..."

I started overheating. "Fine. I love him. Now you are going to help me flirt with him."

She pondered for a moment. "Well, as much as I hate you, perhaps..."

Loba snickered, "I'll make an exception this time, demon~"

"Don't expect me to thank you, girlie." I reminded her.

"Ugh, shut up demonío. Your voice is so grating..." She complained.

"My fangirls certainly disagree-"

Narrator POV

It had been a few hours since Revenant had first asked Loba for advice. She was the master of flirting, after all!

Although she had only flirted with humans in the past, her advice was helpful to the simulacrum instructions on how to flirt with the innocent MRVN.

"Oh, and lastly: Keep the flirting PG~" The female laughed.

Revenant groaned. "Whatever."

And that is when he left her room, to search for the MRVN.

But Pathfinder managed to find Revenant first. He was a great tracker, as stated in his name!

"Hi Revenant!" The MRVN greeted the simp.

The sudden appearance of the smaller robot surprised the synthetic nightmare. "Gah, Path!"

Pathfinder gave Revenant a hug. "I love you, friend!"

Revenant was trying to to die from a gay panic attack, which he had whenever being near Pathfinder.

"Let me go, tin can!" The taller one demanded.

His crush obeyed, and released the simulacrum. "Guess what Revenant? I found this amazing book in Wraith's room! She has wrote a lot of chapters, and the book is called Rev-"

"Shut up, Path..." He groaned. "I need to tell you something..."

The MRVN tilted his head in curiosity. "Ooh! What is it?"

Revenant sighed, making a mental note to kill himself later for what he was about to say.

"I recognize your name. It's next to the word 'adorable' in the dictionary."

Pathfinder's screen displayed a blushing emoji. "Oh!"

The synthetic nightmare blushed internally. "I thought nobody was perfect. I guess you're nobody~"

The blue mechanical mind held both of his metal hands against his chest, intertwining his chunky fingers. "Revenant friend..."

"You're name describes you perfectly. You found the path to my heart~"

Pathfinder's computer screen was completely filled with hearts. "Wow Revenant, was that flirting? Flirting means something good!"

He nodded, "Yeah Path..."

The MRVN booped his optic against where Revenant's lips would have been. "Wow! I kissed you! That felt great!"

The simulacrum stuttered, "Th-That was a kiss?"

"Of course, friend!" Pathfinder 'kissed' the synthetic nightmare again. "I love you, Revenant!"

The love was too much. Revenant overheated like the simp he is, and shut down, collapsing to the floor.

The MRVN was concerned. "Revenant? Are you okay?"

And he very much was okay.

He was just flirting with an angel...