My Empty World

chapter 22

Beep ,Beep ,Beep

My eyes opened slightly since I still felt weak.
I can't believe this but I think me and the hospital are buddies now.

I saw Nick, Caleb, Lexie and David.
I tried to sit up which they noticed and ran to me.
Lexie attacked me with a hug crying.

"Oh m..my God I thought I fucking lost you Madison Bella Ryan"she said with drops of her tears falling on my temple.

"What do you mean?"I asked but it came out more like a whisper.
"Well it was lunch and I didn't see you so I went looking for you but I saw you unconscious on the floor"David said.

"That's odd I only felt sleepy"I said.
Caleb and Nick walked towards me"Madison we are sorry we were dicks and we are so sorry"Nick said putting my hand in his.

"And I'm sorry for being a jealous freak"Caleb said which earned a weak giggle from me.

"I'm also sorry Nick for not trusting you"I managed to say a little audible.

Nick smiled,someone coughed which caught my attention.
"Mom"I said and she smiled walking over to me and gave me a  hug.

"Mom I might not have died from anorexia but I can die from this"I said and everyone chuckled.

"Come on let's go home we have a lot to talk about Missy"she said tears dropping down her eyes.

"I'm sorry"I whispered and she just gave me a little smile.

****
Lexie and the guys followed us home.
We all sat in the living room as my mom brought coffee for us.

I took a sip and let the warm feeling pass through my throat,I let a sigh of content out and everyone looked at me.

"How long was I gone?again?"I asked and the guys chuckled but Lexie didn't seem to get.

"Actually you were at the brink of death Madison I almost thought I would have lost you just like....."my mom trailed off and looked away from me cleaning her tears.

"Listen mom I miss her too but can we just not talk about that right now?"I asked but she took it the wrong way.

Everyone looked at us confused but me and my mom knew what we we're talking about.

My mom gave birth to twins,yeah shocker.
Her name was Maya.
We were always there for each other but one day........

"Come on Maya let's go buy ice cream"I said excited.
"No Madi mom  and dad said we couldn't leave the house we are just eleven for Christ sake I don't want to get kidnapped or worse raped"she said cringing.

"You've got to be kidding me Maya it's just two o clock in the afternoon everywhere seems to be busy and besides the ice cream truck is just opposite us a few feet from here,why can't you just go with me?are you a chicken?"I dared her and she immediately stood up.

"I...I'm n...n..o....not a chicken"she said stuttering and I giggled.
"Okay then let's go"I said dragging her by the wrist.

She hesitated for a while before following me.
The road was quite busy but we are eleven which is close to being a teenager so we are big girls.

The road was really busy and I felt Maya's hand shaking in my hold.

"Maya you scared?"I asked and she straightened herself"n.....no!"she exclaimed and I laughed.

She was always scared of crossing the road.
"Prove it"I said and she just smiled"okay"she said and without thinking she started to run across the road until a car driving with speed was heading towards her.

Everything was in slow motion from the car getting closer ,to me running towards her, to her seeing the car but was rooted in place maybe because of shock or fear.

But after that a loud thud was heard.
Blood everywhere,my own blood ran cold and I stood rooted in my place looking at her lifeless body.

People ran towards her and some came to me cause I looked exactly like her,they shook me by my shoulders but I was still in shock it was like I was dead but like a dead man walking or standing.

I just couldn't believe it ,I was the cause of her death.

Since then I always felt like it was my fault that she died although my parents kept telling me it wasn't my fault.

But come on it was obviously my fault!!
I made sure to keep everything that me and Maya shared away somewhere in our attic.

I never wanted to hear that name again cause I felt like it would hurt me till I die.

I knew that my mom didn't hold any grudges about my sister's death,they said I was young and dumb.

But I was sure so dumb and I hope she would forgive me.
"Hello Madi"Lexie said waving her hand at my face.

"Uh...uh what?"I asked"you zoned out for like half an hour"she said but I quickly blinked my tears back.

"Can you tell us what that was about?"Nick asked.
Why does this boy have to be so smart.

"Well aren't you a smartass"I muttered sipping from my coffee.

"My family lost my twin sister all because of me end of story"I said but they didn't push it,good.

"So...?"I asked them.
"So what?"tell four of them asked in unison "how long was I gone?"I asked again a little frustrated.

"Girl you were gone for two fucking weeks your parents were there althrough your dad would have come but he's in a meeting"Lexie said and I nodded.

Nick sat next to me and I rested my head on his shoulder.
Minutes later my mom came.

"Madi we need to talk"she said sternly I sighed and walked with her into her room.

"Madison me and your father has decided to transfer you to another school"my mom said.

"What?!why?!"I exclaimed
"We found out that you've been bullied...."

"Mom I'm fine the boys helped me and....."

"Don't give me that shit,we need you to change your scenario it's good for you and you know that me and your dad wants what's best for you"she said softly.

"Mom I understand I just ...."I sighed not knowing what to say anymore,there was no point in arguing after all they did have a point I needed a change in scenario.

"The doctor said it was best for you"my mom said calmly and I just nodded with a sigh.

She hugged me and I hugged her back"I love you"she said"love you more"I said and she gave me a peck on my head.

There was only one thing I was thinking about in my head and it was.......
What would Nick think about this??

Woah!!!
That was much, didn't have this in mind but sometimes we gotta change our minds.
Anyway I'm still gonna update today so be expecting me sweetie's 💖💝💞