LVLYA

Chapter 92: Yanghe Qizhe

After hearing what Lin Rong had said, Yue Zhishi sat on the bed, stunned, for a long while. By the time he came out of his daze, his face was already dripping with tears.

Ever since he and Song Yu had gotten together, Yue Zhishi had had many nightmares no one had known about as he slept in Song Yu's arms. Such as being caught as they'd embraced and kissed each other, Lin Rong and Song Jin exceedingly angry and hysterical from rage. The fanciful, distorted images in his dreams had been tattered and covered in scarlet, filled with crashes, blows and ear-piercing buzzes like a kind of unending warning.

What people said was true — dreams were the opposite of reality.

In reality, that pair of parents felt pain and suffering more than anger, panic coming before misunderstanding. Because they loved them too much, they weren't able to find even a single place to hurt them.

Yue Zhishi thought he truly was very cruel, but ever since he'd been a child, he'd known only what it meant to give things in exchange. He'd be deeply grateful after receiving the smallest little thing, and then he'd immediately dig out part of himself to trade.

[Thank you. Do you want this? This is mine, I'll give it you. I can give you many, many things.]

To the point where he'd stayed in a hotel room with his lover, and it hadn't mattered how expensive it was; he wanted to pay for one night, too.

He had no way to accept other people's love with a clear conscience.

After possessing Song Yu, it became even more impossible. If he'd been willing, he honestly could've enjoyed a whole lifetime of the Song family's love and care like a family member who truly belonged to the family. But he hadn't dared.

He'd never mentioned it, but Yue Zhishi had always remembered the conversation he'd unintentionally overheard at the hospital. The words 'outsider' and 'someone else' were forever nailed onto his heart.

Because no one knew what would happen tomorrow, because no one knew when this love and care would disappear, he'd planned out his future life in spite of himself. He'd planned out what he should do after losing these beautiful dreams, so that if that day really came, he wouldn't be left with nothing and nowhere to go.

No one would be willing to live a whole life by themselves, and neither did he want to leave this family.

But he had needed to prepare.

The night at 2am was quiet enough to leave people unsettled. Yue Zhishi walked to Song Yu's room and reached out, attempting to open the door. Just like always, Song Yu hadn't locked the door. His room was finally no longer that unbroken darkness with the curtains tightly drawn. The sharp, cold rays of the moon penetrated inside, leaving a broken piece of moonlight on the carpet. Part of the blanket bulged upwards, not moving, and looked like a frigid mountain range underneath the dim moon.

Stepping onto that soft carpet, Yue Zhishi came closer as quietly as he could. It was an untimely thought, but he remembered himself in the past; he'd thought up all those different kinds of ways and ideas in the hope of being able to stay in Song Yu's room. Now, he understood: at that time, Song Yu too had yearned for him to stay.

The two of them in the past had been separated by an unbreakable barrier. They'd looked like they were extremely close to each other, but they'd had no way to touch skin to skin.

After lifting up a corner of the blanket, Yue Zhishi quietly slid inside, finally feeling some sense of warmth as he hugged Song Yu's back. This embrace felt like it'd taken a long, long time in coming, and Yue Zhishi pushed his face into Song Yu's back, his arms wrapping tightly around him.