Short, Gay, Stories 2.0

The f word

No matter how hard I tried I couldn't shake the feeling from my mind. I hated every minute of it, the over thinking, the bullying, the fact that he was right and he knew he was right but he kept doing it.

"Hey faggot." One of the guys nudges my arm hard, pushing me into the locker. I groan and punch his arm back, grabbing my shit and following them. We're friends, ironically. Matt who pushed me into the locker, Raze, the tallest one of our group. And Mason, who acted as if he was the leader, but we're all equal, we just look up to him.

"Leave it." Mason smacks Matt over the head and he groans, rubbing the pain away. "You okay?" Mason frowns down at me and runs his fingers up my arm gently over the red mark from my locker.

"Fine." I mumble, watching his fingers until he stuffs his hands in his pockets.

"You're not tho, right?" Mason scrunches up his nose as if it was the grossest thing. The group has been teasing me latley by assuming I'm gay. Just because I can admit when someone looks nice? "I know we tease you about it but you're totally straight." He laughs awkwardly as I sit on his bed, watching him change his shirt. I definitely wasn't straight.

But I wasn't crushing on my bestfriend either, that was too cliche, too strange.

"Uh yeah, you know me." I smile, eyes settle on his abs as he stands before me with his arms crossed. Did he know what he was doing? I may not be crushing on him but I definitely found him attractive. But That wasn't my problem, strictly his fault.

"Do I?" He chuckles, the lingering tone in his voice I could tell he was teasing me. I kept my mouth shut, knowing I'd give it away if I talked anymore. I was on verge of breaking point; Spilling the beans, telling him everything. "Maybe I don't," I lay my hands in my lap awkwardly and look up at him as he gets closer. His smile fades from his face. "Maybe you're a super secret spy, my very own best friend right under my nose." He smirks, hand reaching and wrapping around my neck. "Josh the super spy." he squeezes gently, pushing me backward on his bed until my arms catch me.

"You freak." I laugh, playing it cool. His eyes slowly move down my body, his hand tightens more making my eyes flutter shut.

"We're both freaks Josh, that's why you're my bestfriend." He loosens his grip enough for me to come to my senses, opening my eyes to observe him. He looks down at me with hooded eyes, mouth agape I could see him biting his tongue. He was so hot.

"Mason," I groan, his hand tightens as I say his name. My eyes shut tight again and I put a hand on top of his. I couldn't take this much longer, I didn't want to look at him this way.

"Josh." He says heavily, taking his hand away. I take a moment to collect myself and stand up, looking up at him. He doesn't move, making us much, much closer than I intended.

"Mason," I whisper his name this time, my eyes at the level of his nose.

"I'm just messing," he mumbles, his fingers brush mine and he steps back, tripping over his own feet. "You should go, I have a shit ton of homework." He laughs it off and sits down in his swivel chair, turning away from me.

Today at lunch was different. After last nights strange encounters it's as if he couldn't stop looking at me. Did he know? Or suspect maybe I was into guys? I realize I could have stopped him so much more if I was actually straight. A wave of anxiety runs through me as Matt and Raze laugh at something they were talking about. I take a bite out of my burger, looking anywhere but across the table at Josh.

"Hey fag you gonna eat that?" Raze ruffles my hair and takes a fry from my plate. The worst part is that we are all really good friends. They don't know they are actually hurting me with their words, so I let it pass.