Short, Gay, Stories 2.0

1

The straps on my backpack were holding on by a thread, my hair was messy and I think I even had crumbs stuck to the side of my mouth from that first day of highschool morning at breakfast.

None of that seemed to upset Leo, to my confusion. Everyone else seemed to view me as some sort of damn to society. The more I think about it the more I wish I had wiped my face before those crystal blue eyes had pierced my soul. I mean really, God did pick favourites with him.

"Ready, Ax?" Short for Axel. His beaming excitement had me on my toes when he picked me up. All of highschool I was the loser, the weird one who automatically made others dodge me. In fact, it's only when Leo was around that I was treated with ultimate respect. Why? Well, Leo isn't exactly a God, but he sure as hell could be resembled after one.

Not to say I'd drool over him all of highschool just to be stuck were I am now. It was grade 6 we met, I wasn't even out to myself at the time. He went through a dark phase where he painted his nails black, I allowed him to do mine aswell. We were there for eachother every step of our growing, odd phases.

But everyone liked to call me names, claiming I was into boys. My small figure led the way to this disaster, while Leo grew in every way. His dark hair got softer, if possible, and his jawline just kept structuring him into everything everyone wished they had at the time. He had that slick smile that made teachers love him, the kind and soothing aura that no one could go against.

Plain and simple, he was popular. I was the rat that stood in the sidelines while the other learned how to make ratatouille. But this still never mattered, because every time I was called a slur, they regretted it. Because golden boy was idolized, everyone wanted to be his friend. With him by my side, he was my protector. He never let anyone believe I was gay, because that's 'fucked up'. And it was, until a year goes by and I'm not so sure it's fucked up anymore.

"Uh huh" I mumble, tossing my backpack into the front seat. His parents had scheduled a moving truck, both our beds at our new apartment. Turns out saving up actually leads to future wants. Not having our after Friday dinners with his friends last year let us save up enough for the student apartments beside the college.

"Come on, you've been excited for weeks and now you're nervous?" He pokes my shoulder as we pull away from my waving parents. I send them a sweet but concerned smile. My mother was crying into dads chest.

"I'm excited." I gulp, my eyes focused on my backpack.

"Mom it's okay," I yell in my room with the door locked. I used the excuse that I wanted to emotionally finish up packing my room, alone. I'm on my knees, reaching under the bed and pulling out a book. I smile while I run my fingers over the black marker. 'Diary'

It was a diary at the least, but a cover that would make others feel guilty for looking inside. I open the cover and see my favourite photo with Leo.

His head was high, he just got blonde highlights (which started a short but popular trend) and his braces had just come off. I was half a foot shorter than him mainly because he was on his tippie toes with a wide grin. I stand awkwardly beside him, a smile fired on my face and it's obvious I'm not picturesque.

"We can decorate." He whispers, my eyes blink at the sound ringing in my ears. So we decorated, I took three hours of the drive to go through Amazon and dollar store ideas so we could decorate our new home.

"This look okay?" I giggle now, my mood at a peak. Our place was amazing. A small but livable living room and a kitchen. Along with two bedrooms and a bathroom.

"I like it." He walks over to where I put a few plants by the window."I like when you're happy," his eyes move from my own to the poof of my hair. He always seemed to have this sort of pep in his step, as if he was excited to see where life would take him at every turn. He gently pats my hair and runs his hand down, letting it linger too long on my shoulder. "You know how we're always there for eachother, no matter how weird we can be?" He chuckles and drops his hand. I immediately think to when he took painting classes with me after I developed a weird obsession with Bob Ross.

"Always," I look back to the plants and clear my throat, walking over to the almost empty box. I carry it to the kitchen, placing it down and putting some dishes away. We're both quiet and he helps finish off the box.

"So, Um." He stands awkwardly against the kitchen island as I fold the last box and put it with the others. "Ax," he whines, leaning closer to me over the counter. Leo and I can get pretty close, never having anything we're hiding from eachother makes it easy.

What he didn't know was that I have lied, and I'm not proud of it. In fact it wasn't a lie for the whole year. I definitely wasn't only into girls, that's for sure. But that doesn't mean I have to act on anything. Thus, not a lie if it isn't real. We trust eachother with everything we have, but the burning sensation to kiss him when we're in these moments slowly eats me alive. "I need to talk to you." He whispers, my eyes floating up to his.

"You can always talk to me, I'm always listening."

"This time is different, I'm nervous." He looks down, playing with the loose piece of tape on the counter.

"You can trust me," I whisper this time, watching him sit down on the stool slowly. He was being weird.

"I know, it's. I just have been thinking," he looks up at me, his eyes stealing my attention. No wonder he always got what he wanted. "I've just been thinking way too much, and well, people experiment in College anyways so it's not that weird." He laughs at himself and steps back. "This is ridiculous, look, we should go out to a bar or something." He rubs at his eyes until they are puffy. I watch the scene unfold until he calms himself down and nods. "I know you're not gay, but I never really thought about it until recently and college is a place to find yourself. I know you won't judge me tho." His thumb goes to his mouth and he nervously bites the tip. He is telling me, his secretly in the closet totally straight bestfriend, that's he's curious?

I'm frozen In place, but I didn't have a choice. I had to be there for him, but without making it obvious I was gay. He can't find out I've been lying for three years.