The Next Chapter

Chapter 58

Jake's POV

Jesus fucking Christ. I'm never drinking again in my life. I'd forgotten how fucked up hangovers are.  

I see her standing by the sink, cleaning my shirt, "I'll do it, it's... It's not your problem." I want to throw up. 

"Sit down Jake. Let the pill start taking effect." Yeah, I'm not going to argue. As much as I hate her cleaning my shit, I can't even stand straight. 

"What about that?" 

"What about it?" 

I'd like to see you without it.

"There's vomit on it and it's pretty. You better wash it before it stains."

"Jake I'm not taking my shirt off in front of you." I'm not going to make her uncomfortable. However much it hurts and however much I want to fucking die I make it upstairs and grab a t-shirt. "Here." I toss it to her. "I'll turn around."

Even if I really don't want to.

"You can turn around now." 

Fuck. She's beautiful. I mean, she looks hot. No. She's beautiful. How did she even fall for me in the first place? I was an asshole back then. Maybe a bit now too. And how did I fall for her? She was the good girl, the girl with a bright future. And I was... The fuck do I know. A kid with okay grades and no fucking idea what to do with my life. Yeah, I did get a great job with amazing money but I'm not happy. I have a fiancé who's fucking someone, a nice apartment that I live in all by myself, just nothing. I would kill to be in her boyfriend's shoes. To have her again, to call her mine, to touch her. I need her.

"What did I do wrong?" I ask before I can stop myself. 

"What?"

"What did I do? Where did I go wrong? I loved you so much and it broke me when you came back with him." I chuckle. "To believe that I actually thought that we would end up together. That we would get married. That we-"

"Stop."

"What?"

"You can't do that. You can't do that!" Jesus, she's loud. "Sorry, forgot you have a headache."

"Fuck."

"What?"

"You've grown." She has, she's a beautiful woman now. Jesus, hangover Jake is worse than drunk Jake. All soft and shit.

"Yes, as has everyone. That's kind of how time works." Love her humor. Fucking love it.

"I know. But I can't call you shortie anymore." I miss those days so much. More than I'll ever admit.

She's quiet for a while before talking again, "Why didn't you put on a shirt when you gave me one?"

"Don't know..." I look at her. "It's pretty hot in here." The things I'd do to her. I'm getting hard just thinking about it. But then it disappears as fast again when something foul hits my nose. "Something smells bad. Did you rinse the t-shirts?"

"Yes I did." She pauses. "Stand up."

"No. Why?" If I stand up I'll puke.

"Just get up." I give up and get up from the toilet. 

She turns me around. "How the hell did you get vomit on your back?" 

I have vomit on my back? Come on drunk Jake, not cool. "The fuck do I know." Wait, I do know. Idiot, "Oh yeah. I threw my shirt over my shoulder, then washed my hands, and then threw it in the laundry bin."

"You-So you took off your shirt than had vomit on it, threw it over your shoulder, washed your hands, just to then grab the shirt that has vomit on it to throw it in the laundry bin?"

Drunk Jake's a real idiot alright.

"Well, it sounds stupid now that you say it out loud." Fuck, I stink now that she pointed it out. I gather my strength, every fucking drop of it, and walk over to the shower. First time in five years that I see her and I have fucking vomit all over me. Pathetic. "Will you help me here?"

"Help you take a shower?" No shit Sherlock. What else?

"I'll keep my underwear on don't worry." Were these pants this hard to put on as they are to take off? 

"Look Jake, no. I'll call your fiancé and she can come and help you-"

"No! She's not coming." I say. "I'd rather have Michael come at this point." I mutter.

"Why? Why are you so against your own fiancé helping you? She loves you and-"

"Loves me? If she loved me, would she be fucking someone else?" How the fuck does my headache just keep on getting worse and worse?

She's really quiet. Just staring at nothing and thinking as she usually does. 

She's beautiful. 

Why did you choose Michael?

Why did you break my heart?

 What can I do to be good enough? Buy you a diamond ring? I'd buy you the fucking world if I could. You just have to say yes. You just have to choose me. Just let me make you as happy as you make me.

If only I wasn't such a fucking wuss and I could say this to her face. 

Her focus comes back to me and she makes her way here and helps me with my pants then helps me get into the shower. I feel useless and weak, I hate it. "You don't have to stay. No need to pity me."

"It's fine. Wouldn't want you to slip in the shower and hit your head." So she cares about me? Did she ever stop?

I didn't. 

I still love her. Always will.

How the fuck could I get engaged to someone while still being head over heels for her? 

The pain.

I needed the pain to go away, but why would I propose to Ava? She's so stuck up, she's in it for the money and she thinks I don't know. She always gets what she wants and if she doesn't she won't talk to me for God knows how long. I'm not allowed to have any friends that are women but there's no problem with her having male friends. And then she has the fucking nerve to cheat on me? How did I not see it coming earlier? She's awful.

The fucking opposite of Emery. 

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 Well... Running out of ideas on what to write here, hahaha.