With or Without

25. Tong

Everything went the way we'd planned. The only difference was we didn't have to do anything once we got home. Pok was too nervous and it made him tired and irritable. I wasn't feeling much better after not sleeping very well but he needed me more than I needed him. I put on a brave face and held him between my legs as we lounged on the bed.

"It's going to be alright," I reassured him and I believe it.

He had worked damn hard for a very long time. All of us would be there to cheer him on. And whatever the outcome, I was going to be there to catch him when it was all over.

I let him go to the pool on his own. I could have gone with him but he was already nervous enough. There was also the matter of their warm-up and last-minute tips and strategies from the coach. The organizing committee would preside over the opening ceremony and go over the schedule.

That was for the benefit of the spectators.
All the swimmers already knew when their fixtures were.
It was the start of three days of the regional swim meet.

There were so many people it felt like a jumbled mess. The truth was, there was order in the chaos. Hits and qualifiers determined who made it to the finals. But it wasn't just a race against each other. It was also a race against the clock. It was anyone's guess how it would all play out.

Pok had explained it all to me before.
It didn'tmake watching the swimmers any easier.

Pok was one of a few people taking part in multiple races on both days. He was particularly good at freestyle and competed in both the 50 and 100-metre races. He also did the relay, the individual medley, the 100-metre backstroke and the 1500-metre freestyle.

Even with all those, he still had time to rest in between each hit. The trouble was, he qualified for everything. The expectation had been that he would drop at least two or three of the races, so he wasn't running from one end to the other on competition day. But he was that good.

I was so proud of him, I couldn't stop smiling or cheering, or calling out his name when he happened by. My voice was sore and I was probably a little manic. Nobody cared that I was a little bit over the top. I just held back my embarrassment and cheered Pok anyway.

"You are bad for me."

"What? Why?"

"Because I love seeing like this; happy. It makes me want to work that much harder. So you see, it's your fault because I've qualified for everything. I am going to be so exhausted."

"That's a good problem to have, right?"

"Maybe. We'll see how it goes tomorrow."

We took him out to dinner to celebrate his partial victory. There wasn't a lot of chatter. Everyone was aware that this was just the beginning. The true test would come the following day and that was nerve-wracking for us but it must have been hell for Pok. I thought he would want to be in his dorm room but he attached himself to me once dinner was over.

I dared not ask what he was thinking. I just lead the way to my room again. We bumped into my neighbour on our way in and he glared at me. I wai'd very low hoping my silent plea for forgiveness would go unnoticed. But I underestimated Pok's observation skills.

"What was that about?"

"Nothing..." I couldn't stop my voice from spiking on the lie.

"Maybe we should go to our place next time," Pok said and that was worse than the embarrassment of bumping into my neighbour and knowing he had heard us—again!

It made no sense that he called his dorm room ours. He's the one who said it didn't matter where we were as long as we were together. I wanted to point out that we were at my place because a part of me wasn't quite ready to go back. But he hadn't asked me. He hadn't said it was a requirement of what we were doing right now.

The trouble was how domestic it all felt. I had to shower and change but Pok had already showered before leaving the gala. I came out of the bathroom to find him lounging on the bed in sleeping shorts and a t-shirt. I was wearing the same thing, having dressed in the bathroom.

"You should get in bed," I told him, picking up a book on my way to join him.

"I'm not tired yet."

"We can read in bed." I indicated the textbook I had opened to the page I had left off on.

"You're just trying to get me to sleep early." Pok accused and I smiled at him

"Is that a bad thing? There's nothing else to do and I don't have a TV so..."

"There's always something to do."

His leer was very clear and I would normally have given in. But I knew he was tired. His eyes were slightly bloodshot and his smile though as beautiful as ever, gave away the effort it took to look as chipper as he did.

"No," I answered decisively. "I'm vetoing that idea immediately. You need your rest."

"You're no fun."

"If that's what it takes," I answered unapologetically.

I didn't expect him to turn over and grab a book from his bag. He was clearly even more exhausted than I had thought if he wasn't willing to fight me. Perhaps, I needed to have an early night as well so he wouldn't be disturbed by the light.

Except it didn't take long before he fell into a deep sleep. I was free to partake of my second favourite Pok activity after making love to him. I got to look at him while he slept. His face and body were relaxed. The slight frown that marred his forehead when he'd been going for too many hours smoothed out.

He was so beautiful.
To think I had nearly lost him.

The second day was a lot less chaotic than the first. There were still a few hits but there were also a few more qualifiers. Pok was lucky enough to have his events split between the last two days and spread out between the morning and afternoon sessions so he didn't have any back-to-back races. He was sure he would manage without a problem.

Watching him go through it was, however, entirely different.

These events were about winning. He was no longer competing against novices or his teammates. He was competing against the cream of the crop and it showed. The hardest event was the 100-metre freestyle; everyone was damn good and they weren't holding back.

A false start had nerves jangling yet Pok looked completely calm. The second try was a bit better. His dive was powerful enough that it pushed him almost halfway across the pull putting him in front of his two greatest competitors.

The second half was harder to watch. Instead of cheering, we were holding our breath as the three swimmers battled for the win. They swam in tandem, none of them getting the advantage they needed. It was impossible to call the winner.

I had never seen a photo finish in swimming but that's what it was. It took the sensors at the end of the pool to determine who was first with barely a full second between them. When the times went up on the board, a cheer ripped through the crowd. Pok had come second. But all three had beat the previous competition record and would qualify for the next round; a slot at the national competition.