I Can't Remember To Hate U

CHAPTER 40

"I can't do that." Oren took my hand in his, afraid of what I would say next.
"But why me? You ... killed my ..." I felt a huge lump in my throat. It was too painful, too hard to even look at him.
"I'll not give birth to this child. I hate it as much as I hate you." I tried to hurt him.
"I'm not sure I believe that. And after all this time, I can't just let go, Lorelei... I can't ... I'm sorry." He looked so forlorn, and in an odd way, almost broken.
"I know." I looked straight at him, and he looked hopeful for a second.
"I will make you pay for everything I'm going through."
"It doesn't matter. As long as you and my child stay by my side."
Tears filled my eyes as I looked away from him. I didn't want to love him anymore, or be loved by him, didn't want the memories of those nights, the pain, the anguish. I looked at him again.
"I don't love you."
"You can do anything you want. And whatever you do, I'll still ..." He glanced at his wrist watch, and then looked at me, his eyes filled with worry.
"We have to go." He said.
"I don't want to go with you. If you want me, you're going to have to take my dead body." And I meant it.
"Lorelei, I'll not repeat this again. We're leaving and that's it." This time his tone had more authority, I almost obeyed his command.
I gave him a defying look.
He released my foot from the chains and came to carry me off the bed. I tried to resist him but my strength was no match for his, so I gave in. I finally understood. I had to live with it, like constant pain. I looked at him as he carried me into his arms to the car.
"I'm sorry..." I said those words like I meant them, but I didn't.
He shook his head, held me tight against his chest, and then signaled the chauffeur to open the door. He gently placed me in the back and placed a kiss on my forehead. I wanted to ask him not to do that. But the truth was, I couldn't. I watched him go around while I carefully planned my revenge. His only mistake had been to show me his weakness. Now, the only thing I had to do was hurt him.

As the chauffeur drove us to that place, I was thinking about aunt Pauline, a life long lost, never to be found again, and my mother.

The house was in a good neighborhood, just around the corner from St Mark's Square, and it was a beautiful home, but it would never be mine. It was Oren's. I felt ill at ease. It was an awesome establishment, with a huge staff, and it belonged to Oren's father. Thomas Tremblay had maintained it almost as a memorial to their ancestors, with priceless collections everywhere, added to only by the rare objects he collected the world, or sometimes by museums. I knew all this because I took art classes, and I hated to admit that the monster had good taste.
"Welcome!" Thomas Tremblay greeted us from the stairs.
"I'm glad that now we can all live as one ... big ... happy... family."  He faked a smile, then took my hand. I struggled to take it back but Oren gave me a look that made me stop.
"I hear you're pregnant. Congratulations my dear." He held me in his arms, suffocating me.  I couldn't believe his audacity. I wanted to scream and call him a murderer but I couldn't.