bob's burgers incorrect quotes (cast + characters)

7

I know I said I was taking a break from this account but it's (one of)  my best friends' AriannaMccaman 's birthday!! Having said that it means most (if not all) of this chapter will be Louise, Kristen, and Dan !! I love you Ari ! Go follow her !

Dan: that's baking soda

Kristen: bacon soda? Sounds delicious but I don't think the world is ready for a pork flavored beverage
_______________________
Generic movie: She was a poem, but he couldn't read

Dan: She was a dancing queen, only seventeen

Eugene: and he was nineteen and never learned how to fucking read

Kristen: when his parents built a strange machine

John Roberts: AYE MACARENA

Jon Benjamin: SHUT THE FUCK UP
_______________________
Dan: Kristen, what's it like to be a caffeine addict?

Kristen: see those six cars? A caffeine addict would see twelve

Dan:

Dan: There's three...

_______________________
Louise: Dad what would you say if one day I came home with five puppies

Bob: Louise...

Bob: Why did this box just bark?

Louise: well...

_______________________
Dan: Did you even listen to a word I said?

Jon Benjamin: In my defense I've listened to five which is a new record for me!

_______________________
Bob: Lin, Gene doesn't have a life plan, he doesn't even have a plan

Bob: like today I found a note to himself to put on pants, and it was followed by a question mark

_______________________
Zeke: okay t-bird go on and assert yourself

Tina: that's my ice cream!

Zeke: great now let them have it!

Tina: you can have it!

Zeke: DAMN IT TINA NO

_______________________
Michael: when you've been in the industry as long as me you develop thick skin

Kristen: i unfollowed you on Twitter lol

Michael: ARE YOU BEING INTERVIEWED BY SOMEONE ELSE!?

_______________________
Louise: okay Tina if you have 10 cookies and I ask for five how many do you have?

Tina: none!

Louise: God Tina it's basic mat-

Tina: because I gave you all the cookies because you deserve them!

Louise, holding back tears: disgusting, get out of my room

_______________________
Bob: careful with the onions Louise, they'll make you cry

Louise: not if I make them cry first!

Louise: *stabs onion*

_______________________
John Roberts during any altercation: Can we all please chill out? I'll make espresso!

_______________________
Jon Benjamin: if you can understand what Dan is saying you're the only one

Loren: BURN

Kristen: wow Jon doesn't understand Dan? Guess now he understands how a book feels

Dan: HA BURN

_______________________
Gene: i broke Louise's Koochi kopi, how long do you think I have to live?

Tina: ten.

Gene: ten what?

Tina: nine.

_______________________
John Roberts: change is inedible

Kristen: do you mean inevitable?

John, spitting out pennies: no