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and john roberts too, happy late birthday john
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Jon Benjamin: I'm on my way...what should I bring?

John Roberts: a good attitude!

Jon: well i guess im not coming.
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John: if karma doesn't get you then i fucking will
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John: you only attract what you fear!

Kristen: AH! I'm so scared of a billion dollars!
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John: am I going too far?

Dan: no, too far was seven years ago, now you're just going to prison
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John: greetings, mr. benjamin

Jon: greetings, problem friend
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Kristen: I don't get it, why don't they invent toasters that can go in the water

John: because our toast would get soggy, duh!

Dan: oh that's not-
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Kristen: what'd you do to your fingers? why are they covered in band aids?

John: you know how tv chefs chop vegetables really fast?

Kristen: yeah

John: i can't do that.
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John: why do you make everything a competition?

Jon: is it really a competition if I always win
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John: i got a weird taste bud

Dan: taste bud? as in singular?

Kristen: I think that one taste bud did you dirty, bud
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Dan: i created you, you created me

John: loren why'd you create that guy?

Loren: i didn't! he's talking stupid!
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John: you look like you went to Harvard

Dan: what that's so silly!

Dan, lowering his voice: imagine that
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John: imagine tolerate it by taylor swift but it's played on a banjo

Dan: your mind scares me.
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John: i got blocked by Josh Groben

Dan: ...I'm done asking questions
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John: Eugene which rapper would you punch right now

Eugene: Kanye

John: valid.
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John: can i have chai tea?

Dan: chai tea!?

John: yea-

Dan: chai means tea!

Kristen: it's like asking for coffee coffee

Jon: just save room for cream cream

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