bob's burgers incorrect quotes (cast + characters)

33

Gene, filming himself: louise gets very upset when i barge into her room without permission, so today i'm gonna show you how to take the necessary precautions to prevent her being mad.

Gene, bursting into her room with an air horn: GET FUCKED

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Tina: stop saying "i wish" and start saying "i will"!

Gene: i will i had a burrito!

Louise: i will i was dead.

Tina:

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Teddy, in the hospital: any news?

Bob: the doctor's waiting on your x-ray

Teddy: but i've never dated a guy named ray?

Bob:

Bob: i'll tell him you need a brain scan as well

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Linda, on the phone: Bobby I'm breaking up-

Bob: I'M PREGNANT

Linda: I meant the phone...what?

Bob: right, sorry i panicked

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Gene, crying: my heart says yes, but my dad says no

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Zeke: i don't think we can manipulate, mansplain, or malewife out of this one boys

Jimmy Jr: manslaughter it is then

Gene: i don't think men should laugh

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Linda, sobbing and drunk: i'd tell bobby i love him but he's so dense! he doesn't understand!

Bob, patting her back: when did you marry someone else named Bob?

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 Bob: years ago i used to feel something pass over me when i'd try to sleep at night, it was so spooky

Mort: it was the consequences of your actions!

Teddy: aw bobby maybe it was your mom!

Tina, quietly: actually it was me, i'd sneak into your bed when i had a nightmare

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Tina:  hey google how do i get this guy to like me?

Tina: ah wait, this is twitter! oops!

Gene: real smooth t

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Louise: mom, can we sneak into a concert?

Linda: why? the tickets are only $35.00!

Louise: ...but can we sneak in?

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Gene: every time i'm around courtney, i get butterflies in my tummy

Alex: that means you have a crush on her! i used to get those around the girl i liked, too!

Rudy: every time i'm around chloe, i get butterflies in my tummy!

Louise: don't go by her then, she seems to give you diarrhea

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Mr. Frond: we have your niece-

Teddy: oh no! what are your demands!?

Mr. Frond: what? no. this is the guidance counselor, bob and linda said you were supposed to pick her up from detention

Teddy, running out the door: oh, damn it!

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Louise: will you check under our bed for monsters?

Jen: look kid, i appreciate your confidence, but if there's a monster it'll kill us both

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Gene: i'm a ventriloquist!

Courtney: are you any good?

Courtney: the best

Courtney: wait what-

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Mort: i think i'm sick, i've been real nauseous lately

Teddy: maybe you're pregnant!

Mort:

Bob:

Bob: i don't know what's worse, the fact teddy suggested it, or the fact i almost had a heart attack

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Genie: i'll grant you 17 wishes!

Bob: isn't it usually 3?

Genie: yeah but...a lot going on here

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Gretchen: you passed out! do you remember anything?

Linda: just the ambulance ride!

Gretchen: there was no ambulance, Gayle and I drove you to the hospital

Linda: but I heard sirens?

Gretchen: that was gayle

Gayle: i was worried

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Millie: is it just me or are we...best friends?

Louise: yeah...i'm definitely your best friend!

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Zeke: i'm gay for you, you're gay for me!

Daryll: jimmy jr why are you gay for that guy?

Jimmy Jr: i'm not! he's talking stupid!