Burnout (K.Sn) [Sequel]

New York Concert

October 15, 2022

Upon nearing the end of the concert I had noticed how a certain someone had begun looking more and more overwhelmed by the loud cheers in the audience. So when it came for us to say our ending ments it didn't come as a surprise for me that Sunoo had burst into tears - simply too overwhelmed by the love that was sent his way from all the Engenes in the venue.

Almost immediately the boys had all huddled around him and hugged him, comforting him in any way they could. Meanwhile I could just stand at the edge of our small huddle, keeping a close eye on Sunoo as he continued his small ending ment. It had been one thing when Sunoo and I was told to stay away from each other during our Seoul concerts but the concerts abroad we had to strictly follow the guidelines. The reason had been that international fans could tend to be a bit more... aggressive when it came to idols and dating, for some odd reason.

"It's alright for you to comfort him," Jay murmured quietly, leaning a bit back to talk me.

"I'll just do it when we're off stage," I excused and shook my head quietly, letting out a deep breath of relief as I stretched my arms in front of me, "it's fine... I have to get over my ending ment now as well," I reminded and pointed to Heeseung, who had taken over for Sunoo.

By Heeseung's last word he had turned to me with an expectant look and my eyebrows shot up in my forehead, making me look around at the boys in shock.

"Noona it's your turn," Jungwon laughed at me and I slowly nodded.

"Ah I forgot most of it," I admitted awkwardly and they all just laughed at me, even if they didn't understand most of it, "but I can say a bit," I waved it off and stepped a bit forward, rubbing my left palm on my pants to calm myself down, "So... what no one but me knew was that today was quite a bit concert for me. They all are. All of them are so big and special to me. But tonight was supposed to really be... the peak. The boys all had their families come and support them when we had our concerts in Seoul and funny enough I didn't have that," I admitted with a small chuckle, "I did invite my friends... previous groups I had been supposed to debut in and such, because they were the closest I came to family in Seoul, besides my boys... but they never came, so that was fine. I'm sure there was a good reason. But I invited quite a few for tonight as well," I admitted and let out a deep sigh before lowering my microphone and scratching at the side of my nose, "we're not gonna have more who cry tonight," I excused quickly when the fans had begun cooing at me, "no, but I invited quite a few. Two of which were kind enough to let me know they won't be able to make it for tonight, they made it in Anaheim instead so it's all good. But... no one came today," I admitted and looked towards the section they were supposed to sit in, it was completely empty, "it's alright though. It's been a while since I've been acting with them and we have our own careers now... it's just..." I trailed off and held my sleeve up to my mouth as my eyes stayed fixated on the section, "I never realized how much I lost for this career, which I love with all my heart. It just, hits different to see like this."

"You're not both gonna cry!" Sunghoon complained loudly and I let out a laugh immediately before pressing both my pointer fingers into the corners of my eyes to stop any threatening tears.

"I'm not crying," I quickly defended to him, "I'm not! I'm not crying."

"It's alright. Because you have us," Jake assured and I nodded quietly before just holding up both my hands to excuse myself and take a step back from where I stood, sighing as I looked up.

Right now I surely couldn't wait to get off stage and get a hug from Sunoo. For the rest of the ending ment my eyes kept drifting off to Sunoo, who was constantly getting comforted by Jungwon. Meanwhile I was trying to keep my own tears back, standing for myself in an attempt to calm myself down.

The moment I got off stage I had pushed myself through the massive masses of staff crowding us. I had to get to Sunoo. The moment I saw his back I just grabbed onto his shoulder, turning him around and latching onto his waist before he could react to my presence.

"What's going on Lily?" Sunoo murmured quietly and ran a hand over my hair as he slowly hugged me back, "what is it?"

"Why didn't they come?" I whispered, eventually looking up at him, "why didn't they come when I invited them? They could've just said they didn't have time."

"Don't think about it," he softly cooed and rubbed my nape softly, knowing it helped me relax in my shoulders when I was stressed  out, "they don't deserve you thinking that much about it."

"They're my friends," I whispered.

"They don't deserve that... if they don't show up it's their loss... you're worth showing up for Lily if they don't see that then they don't deserve you," he assured quietly, "Engenes showed up because you're worth it."

"But they were all I had besides you guys," I pointed out and pulled away from him, starting my relentless ramble in which I pronounced countless words wrong along with syllables going completely missing, "and now I'm just a lonely lost little girl."

"You're not lonely, you're not lost and you sure are little, but that's alright," Sunoo assured as he cut me off, looking down at me with a fond smile, "you have us and we'll guide you if you need help. You know we love and adore you..."

"They were my friends Sunoo," I reminded him and he nodded quietly.

"Did Wyatt and Sophia come see you?" he questioned, knowing they were the most important to me.

"They came in Anaheim," I nodded, letting out a heavy sigh, "it just frustrates me because I really wanted them to come and... you know I've been feeling lonely and all that lately."

"Well, you know what?" Sunoo murmured with a small smile and I shook my head as I looked up at him, "didn't you tell me once that the best people tend to be the loneliest because people never see their worth?"

"Well yeah, but that's about you," I murmured quietly and he snorted in disbelief.

"We're literally the same person Lily!" he exclaimed at me.

"But... I like you more than I like myself," I reminded him and he sighed heavily before pursing his lips.

"Okay, no. We're not doing the self-belief talk now, we'll save that for when we get back to the hotel," Sunoo reminded and brushed my hair carefully with his fingers, "Wyatt and Sophia came to see you and it made you so so happy, tonight Engenes came to see you. To see you. Then who cares if a few irrelevant people didn't come? They simply missed out."

"I need a hug right now," I whispered and he smiled kindly before grabbing my arm and pulling me right into his embrace, making me stumble over my own feet while he just let out a small laugh at me.

"You're worth so much more than people make you believe," Sunoo whispered as he just swayed me back and forth as he held tightly onto my shoulders, leaning his head down beside mine to whisper small things into my ear while he rocked me back and forth in a way to comfort me to the best of his ability - essentially making me feel all warm and fuzzy.