To swear by the Hammer and Sickle

Wake up 5

After dinner I went to bed. There was no point in staying up. I head up to the attic which had become my room and shut the door. I grabbed my phone and noticed a text.

A:hey, I know it's weird for me to be concerned but I want you to know that I'm here for ya! Goodnight and see you tomorrow!

I smiled for a second before collapsing on my bed with a thump. And as darkness consumed me I felt paralyzed. This wasn't good.

If I keep walking I'll be fine. It was a foggy haze with a door at the end. I shouldn't open it I couldn't control it as the door opened. I have no control here I just have to watch.

I opened the door and it lead to a strange room. A large bed in the corner and somebody sitting at the desk. I approached the person and they turned around.

Fear flooded in as I tried to get away. He grabbed me. And although his face was blurry I could see him. North Korea stood there, he had me pinned against the wall.

He followed the same pattern, kissing my lips before going to my neck. It felt like hours of him doing that before he stopped. A bell rang. I was hoping for it to be my alarm. It wasn't, he continued.

He took his shirt off and went for my shirt too. And once he got my clothes off he yanked me towards the bed. Slamming me down and taking off his pants. Before slamming into me hard-

"GOD FUCKING HELL!" The words left my mouth as I shot awake. I wasn't breathing easily. I was shaking horribly and couldn't focus. My eyes were hazy and all I heard was the hammering heart and the pounding in my head.

I looked down. Everything was on. I try to get up, but I'm stumbling around. Then I hear it. "Calm down." I swing around and see nothing.

I slowly calm down and walk over. That same voice appears in my head. "Your father is coming upstairs, everyone heard the outburst." The voice fades out and I'm trying not to cry again.

A few seconds later my father stood at the door. "Russia it's 2 in the morning, are you okay?" He walked closer. I didn't know what to say. I nodded hoping he would leave.

"I don't believe that, you're violently shaking and you cursed at the top of your lungs. I'm not forcing you to talk but I need somewhat of an answer after school." He sighed, before getting up.

"...dad?" I mumble. I wish I didn't but I'm exhausted and the nightmare didn't help. "Yes, son?" He turned. "Am I too old for hugs?" I felt childish for asking that, but I needed it right now.

"Come here, you should know you're not." He opened his arms and I got up and hugged him, it felt safe. I had forgotten how it felt to get hugs from dad.

I gave Bela hugs, but I never let myself get a hug, even if I needed it. "Alright soldier, you okay now?" My father had poked my cheek and I swatted him away.

"Yeah, I guess. Thanks." I missed the nickname for a while It was nice to hear it again. It made it easier to fall asleep. I heard the door shut and a few whispers and then it went quiet.

I didn't feel like going to bed again. I know I should ,but I don't want another dream like that. I grab a book and read. I should skip school tomorrow. Dad wouldn't let me.

I grab my phone and pull up America's number.

R:Hey, Meri, wanna hang out? After school tomorrow and I know you're probably not awake right now. I was curious. Also thanks for worrying about me. See you.