Why are you so bloody perfect?! | jegulus

Regulus

I woke up slowly, gradually, and before I opened my eyes the first thing is noticed was the presence of something warm.
Something, I don't know what, but it was comforting, and I wanted to get closer to it.
I clung to it, snuggling into its warmth.

It's breathing... I realized.

Of course, it must be a person. But who? And where was I again?

I slowly opened my eyes, seeing that I had my face buried into the crook of their neck, so I backed up to get a proper look at who it was, though this was unnecessary.
I recognized that smell, simply the way they felt, the way he breathed. I didn't have to see his dark messy hair, his caramel skin, his lips, nose, not any of his features to know it was James.
Though even still, it took my half asleep brain a minute to process this information.

James.. in bed.. with me.. together.. alone.. asleep...

Wait a damn minute... my mind realized all too late.
I was where!?
How did this happen!?!

Then I began to remember the events of last night.
I remember having a nightmare, a horrible one, though I don't remember what it was about specifically. I remembered being shaken awake gently, tears falling down my cheeks, I remember someone being there. It was James, I had realized, and I had pulled him into bed with me, seeking comfort.
Though I had been half asleep, and hadn't really been thinking about what I was doing, I only cared that James was there.
He must have stayed with me, sleeping with me all night.

What time was it anyway?
Had someone seen us!?

I pushed away from James. I had to get up out of bed before someone walked in. I glanced up and saw that the door was almost shut, unlocked. Someone could very easily open it and see us both like this...
I didn't want that to happen.

I tried to slide out from under James's hold, as he too had his arms around me. But apparently that was a harder task then it seemed.
As I tried to pull away, James's tightened his grip on me, pulling me back toward him in his sleep.

"James." I hissed, trying to wake him up. He furrowed his eyebrows a bit in his sleep, but made no other gesture that he had heard me.
"James!" I whispered louder, and he woke to this.

"...hm?" He mumbled, blinking sleep out of his eyes.

"Let go of me." I told him, still whispering.

"O- oh. I'm sorry." He muttered, whispering with me quietly as he let go of me, drawing his arms back.
We were whispering just in case the others were awake. The last thing we wanted was for them to hear us.

I didn't want him to let go, not really, but I needed to get out of bed. I couldn't be found like this. The others were just down the hall, and they would pass this room if they were to go downstairs.

"I didn't know this would make you uncomfortable. It's just—last night..." James explained to me, not finishing his sentence, but he didn't need to. I understood.

"It- it's okay.. I mean, It's not that. What if someone walks in? The others.. they might see us.." I tried to tell him, sitting up in bed and glancing nervously at the cracked open door.

"What time is it?" James asked me, as he remained laying in the bed, his head halfway on the pillow.

I glanced at a clock that stood on the nightstand beside our bed. It read 7:12.
I told James the time.

"We're fine. The others don't usually wake up until eight. And Sirius will sleep until past nine." James told me.

I looked down at him, torn between believing him and deciding to snuggle back under the blankets, or, play it safe and just get out of bed, which I was already halfway doing both, sitting upright.
I really wanted to stay with him though...

James wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling himself closer to me, his head coming to rest beside my hips. I picked up my arm so that it didn't hit his face, his own arms wrapped all the way around me.
I felt butterflies in my stomach, and was slightly surprised by their presence.

"You can leave." Jame told me, murmuring into the hem of my shirt. "Just give me a second.."

I kept my arm suspended in midair for a moment, before eventually lowering it beside James's head, as I gazed at his sleepy figure.
Unable to resist the urge, I began playing with his hair, which was even messier then it usually was, and that's saying something. But even though it was sloppy and stuck out at random angles, I found his sleep tousled hair attractive in a way.
I ran my hand through it, feeling the texture it had, twisting some strands gently around my fingers. He had very coarse hair, but it was also soft in a way. I liked it.

"Mm.." James hummed. "I didn't know you liked to play with hair?"

"I didn't know you liked your hair to be played with." I countered, as I continued to stroke it.
Eventually, I realized no one was about to walk in on us, and that the whole house must still be asleep, as I couldn't hear any movement. That is, not upstairs. I decided that I could stay with James a bit longer.
I laid back down, curling up so that my head came to rest near James. He looked up at me, his arms still around my waist. He smirked.
"Changed your mind?" He asked me.

"Maybe." I told him. Our faces were now about eight inches apart, and with one hand I traced his nose, as he wasn't wearing his glasses.
My other hand had stopped messing with his hair, and now rested at the back of his neck, as I continued tracing the features on his face.
They weren't perfect, but they were handsome all the same. I liked them either way. The slight bump to his nose, the little bit of unevenness in his eyes, I liked it. His beautiful hazel eyes, his cheeks, jawline, his lips..
I traced these, running my finger delicately across his mouth, tracing his lower lip. This caused James to smirk at me even more playfully.

"Are you going to kiss me or nah?" He teased.

I smiled at him mischievously. "Maybe." I repeated.

"If your not sure, I could make up your mind for you..." James told me, his smile becoming as mischievous as mine.

"You could." I agreed. "Or we could get out of bed before the others find us."

He paused for a moment, studying my face, before he seemed to make a reluctant decision.
"Your probably right." He told me, and he loosened his grip around my waist, sitting upright. I did so as well.
We both crawled out of bed, somewhat reluctantly, now standing on the wooden floor.
James reached over to the nightstand, where he had put his glasses some time last night, putting them on and adjusting them as I walked over to the dresser, and began picking out a pair of clothes.

I decided to go with some grey Nike pants, and a dark colored jumper with a navy blue and black pattern, along with some black socks.
I put the socks on my feet, as the floor felt quite cold to walk on.

"I'll leave so you can get dressed.." James told me, heading over toward the door. I couldn't read his expression.

"Oh, um.. thanks." I replied, not knowing really what to think about that as James shut the door behind himself quietly.
I mean, I could get dressed in front of James, technically, but I don't know if I wanted to.
I was just so insecure about my body, I hated it, and I didn't want other people to have to see it. What would James think? I knew he like me, he somehow found my face attractive, but, how could anyone like my thin, scrawny figure? I was bony, small, I looked malnourished. Maybe I was malnourished.
But what would I do if James decided to change in front of me? What if the situation got turned around? I have no idea what I would do, probably leave the room too...
Had James left because he was uncomfortable? Or did he think I was uncomfortable?
But I was uncomfortable, so should I not be?

Why am I overthinking this? It's not that big of a deal. Now get dressed into proper clothes before you freeze...

So I changed into my clothes quickly, before heading out the door and starting the day.

1478 words

Cough cough
Some more Jegulus
Though no kissing yet I'm sorry
There shall be more kissing in future I promise

But yeah, it so easy for me to write people overthinking in situations, cuz, yknow... it's relatable

Anyway I <3 u meh peeps. Y'all so great