Back To December// Cregan Stark / Hope Mikaelson

35. Unlovable

"A lot has happened since being stuck in this icicle palace." Hope agreed and Cregan chuckled. Hope brought a hand to his face. "But we can talk about it in the morning." Hope assured and she kissed him.

"You suck at foreplay." Cregan whispered against her as he pulled at her clothes.

"I like getting right to it." Hope agreed. "You suck at not being charming." Hope countered throwing his shirt aside. His hands tangled in her hair as she kissed down his chest.

"You suck at not being sexy." Cregan remarked kissing her fiercely as his hands moved over her curves, grabbing her ass.

"I can't control that handsome, I am who I am." Hope agreed as they tripped over the rug falling back onto the bed.

He entered her so agonizingly slow she could barely take it. The man hovering over her wasn't that boy she had fallen in love with, but a man she had re fallen for so easily, so much had changed and yet they were perfect together, they still fit. They tried to fight it, their attraction, their history. But it was impossible. And this right now as he moved into her, this was different. They had both grown and changed and she needed every inch of him, needed to memorize him. He couldnt believe this was happening, this was his life, this was the life they could have had he nuzzled into her and she just ... couldn't ... take it.

"Cregan," she whimpered, nailed scratching along his back as he started to move, each thrust slow and meaningful.

"Hope," he whispered back, drawing her bottom lip into his mouth. She closed her eyes for a moment to decide if the words clawing at her chest really needed to be set free. They did. Holding them inside would've caused too much pain.

"You suck at being unlovable." Hope rasped and Cregan stilled, lifting his head just enough to see her eyes. Her right hand slid up between them to press against his chest. Feeling his heart under her hand. The other trailing over his back. "So..." her voice shook regretted the words already and wanting to go back to their push and pull of awkward tension. Keep it bottled up. "...just remember it's your fault. You made me love you." He blinked slowly as his chest heaved. "But you don't have to love me back." Hope assured quickly. Before he could respond, or worse, not respond, would he just stare back at her, in an endless void of she fucked it up again before they actually got a good fuck in. She couldnt stand the thought of that, pushing him away with honesty. She was fucking honest, she was being honest, she loved him and didnt want to hear that he didnt. Hope stretched her neck, lifting her head and captured his mouth as her feet dug into the mattress to lift her pelvis. Urging him to move again, she snaked her tongue into his mouth while her hand grabbed his ass. He moved. They moved. Her heart leap from her chest, free falling as her mind and body got lost in Cregan. Her stupid heart, suddenly felt so vulnerable, frightened, stupid, stupid, crazy, impulsive heart. But he kissed her, holding onto her and she let her mind fade away from her words and focused on him.

Night had fallen, darkness covered the sky, stars dimly littered among the clouds and Cregan pulled her closer. He tilted her chin up and captured her lips. His kiss stayed, connecting, as her body built and fell beneath him, the sound of his name a whisper in the dark. She wanted to stay like that, never leave this moment and forget about all the rest, every moment before and after this, she just wanted him.

Hope closed her eyes leaning into him. She fell asleep against him and it was a familiar feeling. Felt his fingers threading through her hair. Slow and simple and it made her smile. Made his pulse that much stronger in his veins. Hope that she was staying. That she loved him and maybe she would come back, she would stay.

Fingers threaded together she started to move but cregan kept her to him.

"I should check on daeron." Hope remarked but she didnt want to move she sunk back into Cregan. She also didnt want him to remember her declarations and decided that running now before they had a chance to make things awkward but he kept her to him.

"He can handle himself for a while longer." Cregan rasped in her ear. He kissed along her neck hands trailing her body. She forgot what she was missing out on the past years. The pleasure of it... but she assumed it was Cregan she missed more, that no one else would make her feel the way he did.

Cregan took a moment to steady his breath, his hands. He got his elbows under him, looking down at the beautiful woman sprawled beside him.