Starlight

Chapter 40: Walk Home

I've done the walk of shame once or twice. Never have I felt as much shame as I do now. I complied with Jax's wish and left the apartment. Now, I'm walking home, trying not to cry. I should've learned after the first time that getting attached to a J brother was bad news. I've just always wanted a little sibling and Jax was really starting to feel like one.

"Evelyn," a voice called behind me.

I whipped around to see Jai running towards me.

"Hey, you left before I could say goodbye," Jai said breathlessly, "why don't I walk you home? It's late."

"Oh, you don't ha- did you run the whole way here?"

"Yeah," He huffed out.

I was so breathless I felt like I was the one who'd just run a mile. Why was he making this so difficult? Why did I hope he would come after me? This makes it suck ten times worse. I can't tell him to get lost after he ran after me.

"You really want to ride the subway?" I tried to deter.

"Absolutely, who doesn't love the smell of booze and piss," Jai said, cracking a smile.

A chuckle escaped me before I could stop it.

"Alright, onward and upward then," I said with a smile.

Jai fell into step beside me. We were silent as we walked, but it was a comfortable silence. It was a cool October night. The gentle breeze was enough to have me shivering. I was grateful when we stepped down the subway stairs.

Once we boarded the subway Jai grabbed my hand to lead me to a spot that had two seats next to each other. An advantage of riding so late at night. Only, when we sat he didn't let go. Instead he twisted his hand so our fingers intertwined. Why did that simple action send flutters through my stomach?

"Why don't oysters like to share their pearls?" Jai asked suddenly.

I tried to suppress the smile already tugging at my lips. "I don't know, why."

"They're just a little shellfish."

A mix between a scoff and a snort escaped my mouth. "God, where do you keep getting these?"

A small blush took over Jai's face. "After you told me how much you love dad jokes I may have looked up and memorized a couple."

"That is.....I think that's one of the most thoughtful things anyone's ever done for me," I admitted.

"You better be joking. Otherwise I've got people that I'm going to have to give a talking to," Jai half teased.

"What's the most thoughtful thing someone's done for you?" I asked.

"Hmm, that's a tough one. It might be when Jax made me a pinch pot for Father's Day one year."

"Fathers - are you....?"

"No," Jai said with a laugh, "I'm not Jax's dad. Our father died when he was really young and with me being twelve years older than him I tried my best to fill the gap."

Oh god my heart.

"Twelve years, so your thirty?"

"I am, yeah. I guess I don't know how old you are," Jai admitted.

"I'm twenty four. Wow, thirty..... you look good for an old man," I teased.

Jai bumped his shoulder against mine. "Listen here you little shit, you're supposed to respect your elders."

I laughed at that.

"You have a beautiful laugh," Jai spoke quietly.

I looked up into his vibrant green eyes. He was looking at me with such tenderness. It made my heart rate somehow speed up and slow down at the same time. It made the rest of the world feel so insignificant. It made everything feel beautiful and special, even the dingy subway.

"Thank you," came from my mouth in a whisper as I stayed trapped in his eyes.

Jai sucked in a breath and opened his lips to speak. Before he could say anything I felt the subway come to a halt.

"Shit, this is my stop," I exclaimed.

We said nothing as we jumped up and ran for the doors. Our hands stayed connected as we walked up the stairs and back out to the streets. My heart was still pounding but I don't think it's from the exercise. Before I knew it we were in front of my building.

"Well, this is me," I said, my voice sounding shy to my own ears.

"I'll walk you to your door," Jai told more than offered.

I couldn't look at him. The entire climb up the four flights of steps I couldn't bring myself to glance his way. If he looked at me like that again I would melt into a fucking puddle. If he looked at me like that I might spill the beans. If Jason found out about him walking me home I'd be in danger. I don't want to think about what he'd do if I told Jai everything.

Once we made it to my door I pulled my hand away from Jai's to get my keys. My hand feels so cold without his warmth. Once I unlocked my door I turned to face Jai.

"Thank you for walking me home," I said, looking at his chest.

"Of course, anytime."

"Get home safe," I said, turning to head inside.

"Evelyn, wait," Jai's voice came out panicked.

I whipped back around and looked up into his eyes. Before I comprehended what was happening Jai's lips were on mine. I sucked in a breath as one arm wrapped around my waist to pull me close and the other hand tangled in my hair.

I didn't realize I was kissing Jai back until I felt our tongues moving together. Holy shit. Holy shit. Our bodies were fitted so perfectly together. At some point one of my arms went around his waist and the other tugged off his glasses before wrapping around his neck. I gently nipped at his bottom lip. A groan escaped his mouth that made heat pool into my core.

Holy hell, how did I forget how good he was at this?