Soft For Her

Chapter XVI

(Soojins POV)

Minho made things so confusing for me. I couldn't tell if he wanted to be together or not. He never officially asked me out, but he was always kissing me.

It has been a few days since then and he occasionally stays with me and vice versa. I'm almost too scared to get so attached to him.

I've noticed that when he comes over, I get too touchy. I try to give him some space even though he doesn't ask, but I want to know what we really are.

Does he like me? Are his feelings true? I would occasionally ask him these sorts of questions, but all he ever did was kiss me and smile. Was that good enough?

One night I decided to be straight forward with him about the situation. "Minho."

"What is it?" He turned to face me. He was in the kitchen making dinner for us.

"We need to talk." I walked over to the table and motioned for him to sit down with me.

"I'm all ears." He smiled.

"Well, do you really like me?" I kept fidgeting with my hands. "I mean, you say you do, but sometimes I feel like it's all been planned out." He tried to do that same thing he always does. "Minho, I need to know.
Use your words, please."

He sat back down rather quickly. "I've never felt like this before so I assume it was because I like you."

"You assume?" I rolled my eyes. "You can't assume you like someone. It's not something you're skeptical about. You just know."

"I always feel the need to protect you, that's got to mean something, right?" His voice was whiny.

"That doesn't mean anything. I saved Ari. Does that mean I have feelings for her?" I screamed. "No, she's just a good friend of mine."

"Soojin, I have no bad intentions. Just let me figure this out." He walked up to me, trying to hug me but I pulled away.

"I'm not going to let you figure this out at my expense." I scoffed. "Which am I? Your girlfriend or just a good friend?"

"I honestly don't know, I'm sorry." He looked down at the floor.

"Just get out. Come find me when you figure yourself out." I walked into my bedroom, slamming the door.

(Minhos POV)

As I walked out onto the porch, I felt my heart break into pieces. I felt like I had lost something.

My life has always been hard. I don't know how to handle my emotions. I've learned it is best to not feel anything so when I do, I feel it all at once.

Did I really like her? Was she just a friend? I needed to figure this out, but I didn't know how to.

Maybe it was best if we went our separate ways for a while. I think it would be best if I moved away and left her alone.

The next day, I booked the first flight across the country. I needed some time to think. Did I really want to be with her or was this all in my head?

(Soojins POV)

The next day, I had waited for Minhos calls. Waiting for him to show up at my door.

I was on winter break so he came over more often, but ever since I told him to leave, he hasn't came back.

I was starting to regret what I had done. What if I never heard from him again? I didn't want him to hate me. I just wanted answers.

I decided to call Ari. Maybe she knew how he was. "Is everything okay?" She answered.

"Actually, do you know how Minhos doing? I haven't heard from him in a while."

"Come to think of it, I haven't heard from him either and no ones seen him." I sighed.

"If you see him, can you tell him to call me?"

"Of course I will." I hung up.

I sat on the couch with my knees to my chest. I was always so hard on myself after Seunghan died. I felt like a bad omen.

The only person I could rely on was Ari. We met when I first moved here and we've been inseparable since then.

Maybe Minho just needed his space. I was willing to give him just that. He deserved space as much as I did.

~Later That Day~

I decided to go on a walk and get some air. I felt like I was suffocating in this house. It was getting unbearable.

I put my shoes on and grabbed a jacket. I walked down the stairs and took a deep breath in.

I started my walk. I observed nature and even bought some coffee on my way.

I kept thinking about Minho. Does he wish to live normally? Does he like what he does? This walk was supposed to clear my head, but somehow I was more in my head than before.

I sat on a bench and rested. My leg was getting tired considering it was still in the process of healing.

I wanted to change Minhos life. Give him something to love and look forward to, but we were just too different.

He could not love me as much as I love him. There will always be a barrier separating us. It was inevitable.