The Devil's Honey

SEVENTEEN

SEVENTEEN
⛓️Xavier⛓️

39 years ago - 5-year-old Xavier

"Where's Mama?" I pestered my dad, clutching the bear to my chest as I followed him around the huge house. "Where's Mama?"

"She's gone, Xavier!" He spun around, and yelled at me, causing me to stop, my bottom lip trembling. "She isn't coming back, she doesn't love you enough to stay!" He continued to shout, smashing up the nice house as I watched with wide eyes.

"Why?"

"Because she's a bitch!" I gasped at the bad word.

"B-Bitch?" I repeated the word, and he didn't scold me. He agreed.

"Yes. Do you know what love is?" I nodded my head.

"You tell me you love me all the time, and Mama used to say it too." But I couldn't remember the last time she had said it. My eyes watered.

"Love is bad." What?

"It is?" I whispered, nibbling on my bottom lip. "But my book said it's good, and so did Mama one time."

"Books are full of shit, they're not real, they're as fuck as your bitch of a mother. You shouldn't love anyone, it will only do you unnecessary damage in the future." He sighed, resting his hands on his hips.

"I shouldn't love anymore? I can't say it?" I tilted my head.

"No."

18-year-old Xavier

I'm sitting on a park bench, watching Rocky smother his girlfriend with a load of hugs and kisses. My dad always told me that relationships are pointless, and that there was no point in getting into anything with a girl.

But looking at how happy my best friend was with his girl made my heart ache a little. He looked at her like she was the best thing in the world, like nothing could shine brighter than her.

They hugged each other goodbye and went their separate ways, Rocky making his way over to me, but he never stopped looking over his shoulder until his girlfriend had disappeared.

"You good?" He questioned, taking a seat next to me on the bench. I nodded my head. "How was prison?" He nudged my shoulder and I sighed.

I had been arrested for seven months due to petty theft. My father could have easily bailed me out, but he told me that I needed to learn my lesson, and that I shouldn't have been caught in the first place. "Shouldn't you have gotten out a month ago?"

"I got into a fight, so got extra time." I shrugged, looking around the park to spot yet another couple all loved up. I rolled my eyes and looked away. "What's so special about having your girlfriend? Does she not get put off by what you do, you work for my dad, Rocky, and he's part of the mafia?"

Rocky chuckled and leaned back against the wooden bench. He's only twenty and the fucker's body is nearly covered head to toe in tattoos.

"She loves me for me, X. I try my hardest to keep her away from what I do, she doesn't ask questions, and I don't tell." He fiddled with the bracelet she made him a year ago.

"But don't you get bored?" Rocky frowned like I had just insulted him. "What's the point in love when it will just end in heartbreak." That's what my father always told me anyway.

"I respect your father, X, I truly do. But he's fucked your mind up when it comes to love, you can't stop yourself from feeling it. It's gonna happen." Rocky stated like he could see into the future or something, and I scoffed at his confidence.