"I Just Gotta Get Out of L.A": a Jatt Mpregfic

25) I'm screamin' out but I don't make a sound

A/N: I'm back to updating this book. Yay. I have some ideas. I need more.

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Josh

It's been a few weeks since my album release party. I'm not mad at Matt anymore for not showing up at the party.

Today is my 6 month mark and I can feel it as I walk across the hall.

My bump is bigger and my pain levels are higher.

I hate this.

I just want him out of me.

Matt and I haven't decided on a name yet.

He's been busy filming the movie and making money so we can support this little one's future.

I've been doing press interviews about my album and avoided traveling to radio stations and events in person.

I don't like my fans seeing me like this, all fat and in pain.

That is if I have fans anymore.

I lost a lot of them when the baby was announced on social media.

I don't care though. Social media is all fake lifestyle shit.

Sorry for cussing junior.

"Josh, you've been quiet since we got to the doctor's office. Is there something wrong?" Matt holds my hand while I wait for my OBGYN to call my name.

Thankfully, this is a very private small office where paparazzi can't find me.

It's outside of downtown Atlanta which makes it harder for Matt to get back to set since it's so far away.

"It's been 6 months of this. I want him out." I say quietly since other patients are here.

There's another mpreg couple here which is a relief to me.

"I know. I want to meet him too. I'm so proud of how much you've overcome these last few months especially since we moved." Matt says quietly.

I feel junior kick hard on my lower abdomen and stay quiet till the doctor calls me.

He's been really active since the album release and I think the baby likes music.

It's just a guess.

When we're in the small sterile room I lay on the bed and bite my lip.

I hate the gel they put on my belly.

"Josh, how are you feeling?" The nurse whose doing the ultrasound says to me.

I have to tell her the truth. I haven't told Matt this since he's been working and talking to his sister a lot on the phone.

"Not great. I want him out. He kicks really hard now and it hurts. I feel dizzy a lot when I get up to go to the kitchen or living room. And I think I have heartburn I don't know. It's painful. Even my ankles are swollen and I hate going to the bathroom. This bump is so stupid. I hate this." I admit to the nurse who is writing all of this down on her clipboard.

The nurse looks at me sympathetically and smiles.

What the fuck?

"Josh, all of these symptoms you are explaining to me are perfectly normal for someone 6 months pregnant. I'll have to talk to the doctor about the kicks being painful. They shouldn't hurt much. It should feel like the baby is moving or little flutters. It's okay to be frustrated and hate this process. You are so strong and brave. You can do this. Just 3 more months." The nurse says to me while giving me a half-smile and I don't even react to her.