𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧- 𝐒𝐞𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐒𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐥
Some people don't know what they have until it's gone.
But what about the ones who do know?
The ones who never took a damn thing for granted? Who tried their hardest to hold on, yet could only look helplessly...
The wind tugs at my jacket, biting through the fabric and chilling me to the bone as I stand on the rooftop of the tallest clock tower. The city sprawls out beneath me, a maze of twinkling lights and shadows that stretches to the horizon. I stare at it all, my eyes solemn, my thoughts a tangled mess.
How did I let everything fall apart so completely?
Gon... Killua... I can still see their faces— imagining the pain in their eyes.
I let them down. I was weak. I was defeated. My enemies crushed me, and in doing so, they crushed the ones I love.
I wrap my arms around myself, trying to fend off the chill, but it's not the wind that makes me shiver. It's the guilt, the unrelenting, suffocating guilt. I can't help but feel like the worst person on earth. Every mistake, every failure, feels like a wound that will never heal.
Why couldn't I be stronger? Why did I falter when it mattered most? I should have fought harder, been smarter, and done something—anything—to protect them. Yet I died... and for whatever reason I was brought to life, I forget about them. And now, all I have left is this crushing sense of guilt.
The city's noise drifts up to me, a dull roar that can't drown out the thoughts in my head. I close my eyes, but the images are still there, the memories sharp and unforgiving. I had been their shield, but in doing so, I became the cause of their suffering.
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"I really am... a terrible person," the words barely audible over the howling wind. Suddenly, I sensed someone approaching.
"Damn right, you are," a voice cut through the night air.
"...!"
Startled, I turned my head and found Killua standing there, his hands buried in his pockets, his eyes fixed on the city below. The nonchalant look on his face was infuriating, and he smirked as our eyes met.
"Killua..." I clenched my fists, trying to keep my emotions in check. "W-What are you doing here...? How did you know I was here?"
He chuckled, a sound both familiar and unsettling.
"It wasn't that hard to guess," he replied, his voice carrying an edge of amusement. "You used to go to the highest places when something was bothering you, right?"
His silver hair gleamed in the moonlight, casting an almost ethereal glow around him. I found myself staring, lost in the contrast of light and shadow that played across his features. Then he spoke again, and his words struck me like a thunderbolt.
"Rin."
My eyes widened in shock. He never called me Rin. Ever since we met on Kame Island, he'd always called me Ringo. Only Gon had called me Rin. Killua's refusal to use my alias name was his way of keeping me at arm's length, of denying that I was the same person as his dear friend who had died five years ago.
