𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧- 𝐒𝐞𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐒𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐥
Some people don't know what they have until it's gone.
But what about the ones who do know?
The ones who never took a damn thing for granted? Who tried their hardest to hold on, yet could only look helplessly...
Killua stood there, frozen, as if my words had struck him harder than any physical blow ever could. His lips parted slightly but no words came out. For the first time, I saw hesitation in his eyes. He just stared at me with his eyes clouded with something I couldn't quite name—anger, frustration, or maybe... hurt?
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That look made my chest tighten. I had seen him mad before, seen him reckless, seen him furious. But this—this was different. This was silent devastation.
And yet, I refused to take my words back.
I steeled myself.
"I'm not like you, Killua," I continued, my voice steady despite the storm raging inside me. "You still have something to fight for. People to protect. But me... I lost that a long time ago."
Killua's fists clenched at his sides. His jaw was tight, his whole body rigid. "That's not true."
"It is," I whispered. "You just don't want to admit it."
I turned away, the weight of it all pressing against my chest. I didn't want to argue with him. I didn't want to see his face right now.
But before I could take another step, he grabbed my wrist.
"Stop," he snapped, his grip firm but not painful. "You don't get to say that. You don't get to decide this alone."
I swallowed hard.
"I've already decided."
Killua's grip tightened for a second, then he suddenly let go.
His voice dropped, quiet but sharp. "So that's it? You're just gonna give up?"
I refused to look at him.
"You don't understand."
"Then make me understand!" he shot back, and I heard his breath hitch as if he was struggling to hold something in. "Because right now, all I see is you running away!"
"Dying is the easy way out. But living? Facing every challenge, every storm, every damn struggle... that's what makes our lives meaningful."
My heart twisted painfully.
I shook my head, taking a shaky breath. "You think I haven't tried, Killua? You think I haven't clawed my way through every hell imaginable?" I turned to face him again, my throat tightening. "I did. And none of it changed anything."
His lips parted slightly like he wanted to argue, but no words came out.
Good. Maybe now he'd finally see that this was inevitable.
That my existence had always been doomed from the start.
I took one last step back.
"I told you... You shouldn't get attached to me, Killua." My voice was steadier than I expected as if I'd said this a thousand times before. Maybe I had. Maybe not to him, but to everyone who ever made the mistake of caring.
