Song for the chapter: I'm A Mess by Ed Sheeran
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I should just drop it, enjoy the rest of the day with Luke; be happy with him. I want us to be happy, that's all I want. We have gone through too much to not be happy together. That's all I want. But I have to tell him.
"Well to start, I've always gotten a weird vibe from Louis. Ever since I first met him, there's just been something...off." I pause. "The way he looks at me, talks to me, anything. I feel tension from him immediately when I walk in the same room as him. I could never figure out why.
"When you...left, Louis helped me a lot. He was there for me to talk to when you guys came home and I spent more time with him. The first night that I saw you guys and got upset when we talked ouside, Louis took me home and let me cry to him. When I was dozing off, I heard him say that he would never hurt me. I thought oh okay, he just meant that he wouldn't be mean to me or ever leave me. No big deal. As the time went on, I felt him come onto me more. While we were dating I even felt it. I felt awkward when we were all three in the same room because he would always be staring at me." I pause before getting to the major stuff; scared of what the outcome will be.
"When we were on our break because I was being a dumb bitch, I spent more time with him. We spent most of the wedding and reception by each other's sides. When you came to see me at the reception, I wanted to jump into your arms so badly Luke, but I was being stupid and thought I needed more time. I was a wreck after you left. Calum gave me this big speech about you and how I needed to do what was best for me.
"After the reception ended, I went to bed and so did everyone else in the house. I went downstairs late that night to get some ice cream in an attempt to make me feel better. Louis came down there shortly after and we talked for a few minutes before he...kissed me. I knew in that moment that I didn't want anyone else besides you and that I had to have you back. I felt nothing from the kiss Luke. If anything, I felt the absence of your lips. I felt guilty that someone else's lips were on my own while you were upset somewhere else. He was mad at me for a while because he knew that I didn't feel the same. He's still kind of bitter about it, but he's getting over it I think." When I finish, my eyes beg him for an answer. His grip on my hands has loosened and I know that what will happen next cannot be good. "Luke," I whisper. "Please say something."
Seconds later he is up and packing everything. "Get in the car," he says sternly. What have I done?
I help him gather our things and follow him to the car as he storms off. He drives fast down the highway and I can't help but worry what he is going to do when we get home.
"Please stop driving so fast. I need you to talk to me," I beg. Did I mess everything up this time? Is this it for us?
My thoughts are going at a million miles per hour and the silence drives me crazy. When we pull into the driveway, he immediately gets out and is speed walking to the house.
"Luke, please stop!" I yell after him, but he doesn't even budge. "What are you going to do?" He is capable of anything and that terrifies me.
He busts through the door and sets the stuff on the floor in the entryway. Luckily my family wasn't home. In my head, every worst scenario is running wild. Is he going to pack his things and leave? Will he go on tour without me? I couldn't let this go on.
I drop the stuff at my feet and run up the stairs after him. He surprises me when I get upstairs by standing outside of Louis' door, pounding as loud as my heart. Before I can stop him, Louis opens the door and all havoc wreaks.
Luke pushes Louis back and shoves him up against the nearest wall.
"What the hell is wrong with you?!" He yells.
