Repeating Apologies (A Johnnie Guilbert Fic)

It Ends Tonight

"And all the wants, and all the needs, all I don't want to need at all. The walls start breathing, my mind's unweaving. Maybe it's best you leave me alone. A weight is lifted on this evening. I give the final blow."

Today's the day I've dreaded: Prom. I'm really not in the social-gathering kind of mood, I rather stay home and sleep, finals got me beat. Not to mention I've been working extra hours to save up for college expenses. Plus I've been handling a long distance relationship on top of all that. Yes, me and Johnnie have talked ever since I called him out on his 'online life'. Sure he apologized and said he won't do it again, but we haven't really 'talked' about it. And by talked I mean discussed our future, talked about his life and help me understand. I did a lot of thinking though. Gave our relationship a lot of thought. I did have a lot of time to think and well I just have to talk to him to see if I'm making the right choice. I do love him, with all my heart, but can we handle the long distance? We don't know when I'll get off the waiting list, we don't know what lies ahead of us. We live different lives, completely different. Different goals, different futures, we're just different people now. I didn't bring up the prom thing again so that pretty much means I'll be alone. I was hoping I could text Johnnie while I was at prom, but he said he was going to some Warped Press thing with Bryan and was going to be busy all day. It's whatever, I have to get used to this.

~~

I'm almost done getting ready. My mom took me to her friend's salon earlier and I got the whole Prom Makeover experience. I didn't to get a whole new look, just changed my hair color to a lighter brown, trimmed it a bit, and curled the ends a bit. My makeup came out nice, simple just how I like it. All I had to worry about at home was just changing into my dress and mentally prepare myself for tonight. I was going with Adri and Peter, so pretty much I was the third wheel. Yay me. Again, not looking forward to this. I look at my phone, hoping to see a text from Johnnie. Nothing. Instead I got a text from Adri telling me that she'll be picking me up in 20 minutes. Great, just great. I sigh.Let's just get this over with already. I put on an anchor necklace that Mark bought me today. It goes great with the navy blue dress I picked out with Adri. I then pick up my charm bracelet from Johnnie. I look at it for a moment before deciding to put it on. I was contemplating whether or not to wear it since we haven't been on the best terms lately. But I still miss him despite all that, I miss him even more today. I just wish he was here. I hear a knock on my door.

"Come in." I call out.

Dalton opens my door. "Mark wants to take pictures before you head out, think you got time for that?"

"I guess." I say as I get up. "Adri said she'll be here in like 20 minutes."

"That gives us enough time." He smiles to me. "You look great Skye. Can't believe my little sister is all grown up."

"Aw stop it Dalt, you're going to make me show emotion." I softly smile. "But thank you."

~~

Once we're downstairs, I'm immediately forced to take all sorts of pictures. Typical pre-prom photos. One with my parents, another with the twins, then with Hayley, and then with Dalton, and so on and so forth. How many pictures do the need?!

"Okay one more with your siblings." My mom says.

"ANOTHER!?" Auggie is over taking pictures. I feel the same way honestly.

"Actually, give me a second." Dalton is looking at his phone and starts walking away. "I'll be right back."

Once Dalton leaves the room, the twins rush upstairs to avoid anymore pictures. I wish I could run and hide too. I take this time to look at my phone and ask Adri where she's at.