Gabriel X Reader

What Was and Never Will Be

Part 2 of "In Your Dreams"

This was killing you. In a figurative and literal sense. In one world your body was slowly dying, in the other, your mind was at war with itself. The djinn may have died but the spell it had placed on you was growing stronger and stronger by the minute.

"How you doing?" Shaun asked as he walked into the room. "I brought you some hot chocolate."

You smiled and took the mug from his hands. "Thanks. I'm feeling much better." You lied. You were feeling even more scatter brained than before.

"That's good." His phone beeped. "Damn. Jimmy just called in sick. I've got to cover for him. Would you be okay by yourself for a couple hours?"

You nodded and he kissed you on the cheek. "I'll see you later Shaun."

You felt guilty about lying to Shaun, but you had a strange feeling about the dreams. If they even were dreams. You had to do something.

To the library! Books should have the answer. You got changed, grabbed your coat and headed out the door. It was a nice day. The sun was shining, there was a slight breeze, it was perfect weather. That managed to soothe your frayed nerves a bit.

The place was virtually empty. It was so quiet you could her a pin drop. The air-con was on full blast and you were pretty sure that librarian was staring at you. You strolled over to the fiction section. A book leather book on Asian mythology and lore caught your eye.

You pulled it off the shelf and walked over to an empty table. You opened it on a page that had been bookmarked with a silk ribbon.

"Djinn (most commonly anglicised as genies) are supernatural creatures in early Arabian and later Islamic mythology and theology." You read. "They feed on human blood and can poison their victims with a touch. Their poison causes reality-altering hallucinations and can be used either to kill their victims quickly, or to leave victims in a coma-like state while the djinn feeds on their blood over a long period of time. Gross."

This all rang a bell. You were sure that you'd read this article before. You continued to read. "These illusions can either show a person's deepest desire or greatest fear. A silver knife dipped in lamb's blood can kill a djinn, but to escape from the illusion you have to-" You stopped.

You didn't know that simple text on paper could be so terrifying. "You have to kill yourself Y/N. It's the only way." You were out of your mind. But as clear as day, your name was printed in that book. "Y/N, please wake up. I need you, we need you. I'm so sorry. If you don't, you'll die..."

You slammed the book shut. This wasn't happening. This world was real, Shaun was alive, it had to be real! What was happening to you?

"I think Y/N heard me!" Gabriel said.

"How can you be so sure?" Dean asked.

"Come on, fight it! I know you can do it!" Gabriel sobbed.

For a split second your eyelids opened, then closed again.

A vision, gone as suddenly as it had arrived. You tore out of the library as fast as your legs would carry you. Houses flew by as you ran home, tears streaming down your face. You wanted so badly for this to be real.

You opened up your laptop. A picture of you and Shaun at a water park was set as your home screen. You remembered that trip. The way he came zipping down the water slide smiling with glee, his golden hair completely soaked...no. Shaun had black hair.

You looked through the digital photo album. A picture of you at a petting zoo? No, Shaun was allergic to horses, why would you go there? A photo of the two of you at an ice-cream parlour? Shaun was lactose intolerant. A photo of you two kissing on the London Eye?

You remembered that clearly, only not with Shaun. Gabriel had taken you there for your birthday.

The two of you were nearing the top. You quietly watched the multi coloured fireworks explode in the sky. You squeezed Gabe's hand and he pulled you in for a kiss.

You opened the Internet browser and Googled some recent murders. Nobody had their throat or heart ripped out, no impossible killers, no terrifying small town legends come to life. The most mysterious thing was everyone wondering which celebrity is dating which celebrity.

The phone rang. You walked over to the kitchen. You cautiously picked up the phone to answer. "Hello?"

It was mostly static but you could make out a voice. "Y/N?"

"Gabriel?" You whispered.

"Listen, you're going to be fine. Please wake up. Please..." He said.

The door opened. You dropped the phone and it fell to the floor with a clatter. Shaun walked in. "Y/N?"

You let out a small yelp. You grabbed the closest kitchen knife to you. "Stay back." You demanded.

"Calm down. It's okay." Shaun assured you.

"No, it's not okay. You- you're dead." You cried.

"Y/N, I'm right here." He insisted.

"No. None of this is real. I want to wake up" You sobbed. You held the blade inches away from your chest.

"Stay here with me! We'll be safe. No demons, no monsters, no pain-"

"-No Gabriel." You said. You looked your dead boyfriend in the eyes. "I'm sorry Shaun, I really am. I didn't mean for you to die."

"But I'm here now."

"No you're not. This is an illusion. I'm dying."

"You can spend a lifetime here with me. Safe, like you always wanted."

You looked at him. Your heart was filled with so much pain. It would be so much simpler if you just stayed here. "I'm sorry Shaun."

You plunged the blade into your chest. If you were right, you'd wake up. If not, well, you were dying anyways. Everything went dark.

-_-_-_-_-

"Y/N?"

You rubbed your eyes. Your head hurt and you felt like crap but you were alive.

"Gabriel?" You looked around. The archangel was sitting next to you. His eyes were puffy and red, his cheeks were wet with tears.

He hugged you tight. "I thought I'd lost you."

You laughed and hugged him back. "Please. You can't get rid of me that easily."