Broken-an Ed Sheeran fan fiction

Chapter 23

||GUYS I AM SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SSO SO SO SO SO SO SORRY THAT I HAVEN'T BEEN UPDATING LATELY THERE HAS BEEN A LOT OF BAD THINGS GOING DOWN IN MY LIFE AND I'VE BEEN TRYING TO FOCUS ON GETTING BETTER AND STUFF. NEVER FEAR. I AM BACK. AND AM WRITTING. I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH AND THANK YOU FOR CONTINUING TO SUPPORT ME! Don't forget to tell your friends how cool this fic is and like it and rate it and all that jazz. As i said before, warning. For there will be many nerdy refferences ahead, if you understand any of them, lemme know! I love you all. Very much.||

Ed and I drove to the venue he would be preforming at later that night. It wasn't huge, but it wasn't small either. I knew he had played bigger but it was still extremly impressive. 

For some reason that I couldn't really explain, I began to grow a little nervous as we both made our way inside. I had come to Ed's gigs before, never before they actually started, but I had come. Though those were always when we were a little younger, and now he had so many people to help him set up and what not. I guess I was just scared that these people who had become such a big part of Ed's life wouldn't like me..

But where would I get that idea from, right? Stuart liked me, I've known him for years. As for the rest of the crew...I would just have to try and be on their good side. 

Ed slipped his hand into mine and weaved our fingers together as we walked inside. I leaned into his arm shyly, already avoiding the people who hurried around the venue. Stuart approached us with a head nod and began giving Ed instructions on set up and what he would need to do. "Awesome." Ed agreed to the plan.

We were approached by a woman with dark skin and hair that was pulled back into a tight pony tail. She had a headset on which she ws barking orders into, leaving me with no doubt that she meant absolute buisness. Despite her rough exterior she gave us both a smile, "Hi, Martha Jones. Lovely to see you again Ed, who is this?" she asked, gesturing to me. 

"Oh I'm Jordan." I said, removing my hand form Ed's and offering it to the woman. She took it and shook it firmly. 

"Pleasure to meet you. Now if you would follow me." Martha said, turning on her heel and walking through the crowd of people and equiptment. We followed her into a dressing room, where there was a large white leather couch, a mirror, dresser, glass coffee table and a mini fridge. I waited for Ed to enter before seating myself down on the couch. "Ed, we'll need you at the stage in two minutes." Martha said with a nod before turning to go, closing the door on her way out. 

"Well alright then." Ed said with a scoff. He walked to the mini fridge and pulled two waters, tossing one of them to me. "So how should I adress you to everyone?" he asked. 

I didn't really understand what he meant. By my name? "What do you mean?" 

"Well should I just say you're my friend or..?" 

Oh. That. It was a bit of a difficult question really. I didn't want to seem pushy and adress myself as his girlfriend...but most friends don't make out from time to time and hold hands. I would be lying though, if I said I didn't want to be offically his girlfriend, as juvinille as it sounded. And at the same time I never really did break up with Hunter so... 

"We can say friend for now, and we'll talk about all that later." I said, hoping he wouldn't take that the wrong way. 

To my relief, he gave me a "Sounds good." and a smile before walking back over to me, and dropping a kiss to my hair. "I've got to go get ready, I'll be back soon." he said quietly. 

I nodded and gave him a little smile back as he left. I guess I would be staying here until I was instructed to go. Seenig as I had nothing else to do, I whipped out my phone and called Sophie. The phone for a while until a deep voice picked up with a "hello love!" Defienetly not Sophie. 

"Harry?" 

"That is my name." 

I was somewhat confused as to why he would have Sophie's phone, though I wasn't sure if I wanted to know the answer either. "Hey, uh can I talk to Sophie?" I asked, laughing a little 

"Sophie is actually a little busy at the moment, can I take a message?" he asked. I could hear the smirk bleeding into his words. Yeah, I didn't want to know what was going on. 

"No thats alright, just have her call me when she can, ok?" 

"Alright. Take care, love." 

"Goodbye Harold." 

I hung up with a sigh. It was gonna be a long day. 

~~~

After about an hour of scrolling through Tumblr on my phone, bordness was slowly consuming my mind. I really just wanted to get out of the small room. I stood and returned to the hustle of the concert-prep. From across the floor, I spottted Ed talking with a group of people. He looked busy, and I didn't want to be the reason he was disturbed when it was important. Everyone else seemed occupied as well, and I found myself being the awkward girl who was completely out of place. I had become somewhat used to this, seeing as it had happened many times in my life, but now it was important for Ed and I didn't wanna screw it up for him. I decided taking a walk would be an easier outlet than staying here, twiddling my thumbs for a few more hours. I sent Ed a text to let him know where I was going (which I got no response to) before heading on my way. 

The city was surprisingly not as busy as it usually was. There were cars and people, yes, but not as many as there were on a usual day. Strange. Still, I walked down the gray sidewalk, passing little shops and bars, watching cute couples and families walk by. There was a young couple, walking hand and hand, laughing and smiling without a care in the world. There was a group of five girls walking out of one of the cafes. And then there was me. Alone. I hated being that one lonely girl. I hated it. So I decided against continuing down the path filled with other happy people and thier friends. Instead, I turned down a street that had more bars and was less likely to be filled with families and girls on shopping sprees. 

I walked for...a while. Down the same street with no intentions of stopping. I kept thinking of how every decision I made effected my life now. I thought about the little things and the big things and everything I regret doing. I thought about my bruises and about my broken fingers. I thought about every time I convinced myself it was okay to be treated the way I was. I thought and thought until I was on the verdge of tears. I closed my eyes, forcing the tears back, but when I opened them again, I finally focused on what I was seeing rather than what I was thinking. I realized then, I had no idea where I was. There wasn't a soul in sight and the only thing that stood around me was a drug store, a chineese buffet, a bar and three buildings that were empty or for lease. The street was empty and I could hear the faint scream of sirens in the distance. 

Just when I had begun to panic, I felt a rough hand grab my own and yank me around.