For Your Eyes Only

E i g h t y - f i v e

I didn't know what to think of anymore.

I rushed to Taylor as fast as I could go. There wasn't a moment for me to process anything at all. All I knew was she was just walking towards me, I took a glance of Alison and, and in the blink of an eye, when I looked back at her. . . she was lying on the ground, unconscious.

I didn't take the moment to wonder or find out the reason why. I only did what my instincts told me to do. I picked her up from the ground and rushed to my car. What seemed like the fastest I've ever been was my slowest response. The events faded almost as instantly as though everything is in fast forward, like time is jumping that every millisecond, an hour is already ticking by.

I've tried to remain calm as possible but that seemed impossible for the moment. My heart throbbed harshly against my chest, and my mind has completely blacked out with nothing but images and scenarios I feared the most. I'm terrified of those thoughts, I was more than afraid of those coming true. Suddenly everything was back to the darkest times of the accident years ago.

No, it can't happen.

"Daddy, what happened?" Alison's scared voice echoed repeatedly inside my mind. I wasn't able to answer too quickly. I don't even know what happened! I don't know what to say and I don't know what to do! The only thing that had rung inside my head was to get her to the hospital. . . fast.

I put Taylor's unconscious body on the passenger seat and strapped the seatbelt over her. Cold sweat trickled down my forehead as I closed and locked all doors. My chest tightened in the point that I could barely breathe but at the same as everything, I ignored what I was feeling and focused more on Taylor. "Alison, seatbelts, now." I said and she quickly did as she was told.

I was absolutely frightened and I didn't want to pay attention to anything. Still, I remembered Alison was still here. I took a quick glance at her and she seemed terrified as I am. Though my breathing was rather fast, I managed to say, "She'll be okay." I said reassuringly but I didn't believe my words. I want her to be okay, I just can't believe it right now as the worst thoughts came up to me much faster.

I've completely spaced out, the only thing that's making me keep going was getting Taylor to the hospital. I backed the car, barely looking behind and then hit the road as quick as the law would let me. I drove the fastest I've ever did in ten years. I didn't care, I needed to get to the hospital.

I kept breathing like I ran a mile, I wasn't able to calm myself. All I did for the rest of the ride was shake the awful thoughts out of my head, wipe my forehead, bit my lip, and try as hard as I can to focus on the road. I glance at Taylor every once in a while, trying to see if she's okay. . . still unconscious. I kept cursing myself under my breath for being too careless.

Silently praying, I asked for her to be alright. She can't possibly not be. During the past few months, she looked much better, healthier. I barely had an idea and I wasn't prepared for a scenario like this one. But then looking back, I remembered a few things. I would hit myself for not noticing the times when she would get exhausted easily, and the times when she would be dizzy in the oddest of days. Those were simple, she never fainted and she always tells me not to worry. . . now, I could just curse myself because now the worry came back haunting me.

Why does this have to happen?! It was already a perfect day! Why, all of a sudden why does this have to happen? It cannot be happening. This is just a nightmare. . . unfortunately, it was my worst.

Still, as much as possible, I tried to erase bad thoughts out of my head. I'm not going to lose her, she's just exhausted. She's probably just tired. I cursed myself in tiring her too much, why didn't I even think of that?!