Clarity

23. Thankful For Friends

~ZAYN'S POV~

I woke up on the living room floor with dry, blackish blood covering my knuckles. Glass covered the right side of the floor and a beer bottle was spilled all over the coffee table.

What happened last night?

*FLASHBACK*

"Cut the crap Zayn." Harry stops me by holding my arms back. "Its no use.." I let out a frustrated grunt and walk over to the big hall mirror.

"Zayn don't-" Before I had let him finish I had already punched the mirror, sending glass to crash onto the floor. I watched as the blood on my knuckles dripped onto the expensive white carpet, staining it red. When I turned around to look at Harry, I had felt the blood start to boil inside of me. I could punch him right here, right now if I wanted to.

But Harry had already bolted out the front door leaving me alone to stare at the monster in the cracked mirror.

And that monster was me..

*FLASHBACK OVER*

Getting up from the couch, I stumbled over to the telephone and called Perrie.

*RING RING RING*

By the fourth ring I had already disconnected the phone and decided to send her a quick text.

>TO PERRIE<

Meet me out by the dock at 10:00.

>FROM PERRIE<

Why exactly?

>TO PERRIE<

Just come. Please, its important.

>FROM PERRIE<

Fine, I'm on my way.

Stuffing the phone into my back pocket, I quickly heading to the bathroom to fresh up a bit. Washing my hands in the white pearl sink, I watched as the red blood slowly came off and slide down into the drain. After all of it seemed pretty clean, I wrapped some gauze over it and went to go get changed while coming across another mirror in my room.

How can you live with yourself? A voice sounded in my mind.

"Shut up." I said to myself, frowning at my reflection. Honestly I know what I did was bad. So why do I just keep getting reminded of it?

+++

Once I had gone down to the dock I saw Perrie sitting on the edge of the dock in a blue flowy top and zebra print jeans.

"Hey." She said while peering out at the black sea.

"I have to talk to you." I say as I heave a heavy sigh and take a seat next to her side.

"As your 'ex', I am obligated to do just that."

"Good. Okay, I just want to know why were not together anymore." I said as I ran my fingers through my hair. She suddenly turned around to face me with a blank expression filling her pretty features.

"That's because I cheated on you." My heart sunk at her words, so I had to ask. "Why?"

"Uh, I don't know Zayn." She huffed, angrily folding her hands together on her lap. "I just didn't feel anything between us. No sparks, no fireworks, no butterfly's or jitters. I'm sorry but I sort of lost feelings for you a long time ago." My heart pounded violently inside my chest.

"What? Why didn't you just tell me this instead of going out behind my back and cheating on me?" I spit. She then turned her head to look down at her feet and stayed silent for a couple of seconds before answering back.