Just Plain Old Lazy! (Bara!SansxReader) {LEMON}

Story: Forty

AN: woohoo! Didn't think we'd make it this far, AND keep up those reads. Thanks guys.
Jeez, forty actual chapters.
Also, someone punch Sans for me, he's being a sneaky bastardo.

~

You sit at the bar for at least thirty more minutes before he shows up.

You don't notice him, stirring the shot you ordered (but never drank) with your finger. He walks up behind you, covers your eyes, and whispers, "boo."

You can't help but smile. "Sans."

"The one and only. C'mon, let's go home."

He offers his hand, and you accept it graciously. As he makes his way to the front door, you can't help but glance over your shoulder at Bratty and Catty, who are standing not far off and watching, grinning as they whisper.

You quickly look away, hooking your arm through Sans' to get closer to him.

~

At your house, you pull off your shoes as soon as your inside, then ruffle your hair.
Sans just glances at you before going to the kitchen, and you assume that it's for water.
Of course it is.

You glance in as you walk by and pause for a second. He looks distant as he stares into his cup, and you frown.
He glances up, looking almost confused, as he smiles. "Heyah babe."

You nod and keep walking.

~

It's ---pm.
You open your eyes, and Sans is staring at you.
Just a nightmare. He's not gone.

"... it was pretty bad wasn't it?"

You nod softly, feeling stupid for believing it was real.
It's just a nightmare and he's not gone.

"I'm sorry. I should've woken you up."

"It's okay." You whisper back.

Why're the two of you whispering? Who knows.

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

You scoot closer, shaking your head.

"Alright. Get some sleep."

"Thank you Sans."

He's already stopped breathing.

~

"Tensions are high in the household, and the Kar-"

"Sans, can you turn that shit off?"

He glances at you as he changes to the weather channel. You've been doing your whole monthly-all-house-clean-thing for awhile, and he's just been watching you.

Just a bit irritating, that he won't help.

"You done yet?"

Are you fucking kidding me?

"I mean, you haven't asked for help once, and I'm not even sure what your doing."

"Sans, I'm fucking cleaning. The whole house. Could you maybe, I don't know, clean up the living room? Or your room?"

He looks wary now. "Somethin' wrong kiddo?"

You felt your anger spike. "Yes there's something wrong! You've been sitting on your ass for how long? And I've been running around cleaning!"

You notice instantly as he analyzes what you've said, sits up a bit straighter, and blankly says, "I do not have an ass. I am a skeleton."

For at least ten seconds, you're speechless. "Sans. I'm trying to be serious."

"I'm dead serious."

"SANS." You snap harshly. "I'm fucking being serious. Get. Off. Your. Ass."

"I don't have one to get off of."

Now you're just pissed. "Sa- if you can make a dick you can probably make a fucking ass! That's not the point-"

"I can, actually, if I just try." He's still staring at you emotionlessly.

"What? That's not the point! Get up and he-"

"I can even show you. Look-" He stands up, hand moving to the hem of his shorts.

You turn and walk away then and there, fuming as you go to the kitchen and pull down your tea.
Unlike he usually would, he doesn't follow you.

~

Later that night, you and him pretend that none of it happened, getting ready and getting in bed. At one point, later in the night, his hand finds your hip. You've been restless, and you know it's for comfort.
But you roll away anyways, brows furrowing as you curl up.

Sans makes a small uncomfortable noise, then seems to withdraw and leave you alone.

~

You've experienced the snowball effect before, but, now?
This was the worst time to have it.

Your boss had taken you to get something to eat when you'd said you'd had an "argument" with your boyfriend.

"Oh my gosh, you're dating again? That's so good! Tell me all about him."

And so, she'd taken you out, but you somehow.... forgot to tell her that he was a monster.

You and her ended up in (some food place).
She rambled about moving, "a change of scenery".

"Oh, you'll never guess what I saw yesterday!"

"What?" You mumbled.

"There was this couple- a monster and a human- And they kissed!"

You caught on a bit. "Really?"

"Yeah!" She cried, scrunching her nose. "I mean, their monsters. We're humans. Seriously, it's gross."

You stared at her, eyes huge. "It's.... gross? You think that's nasty?"

She scoffed. "Of course! It's practically beastieality!"

You glanced at your small drink. ".... oh."

"Hey you okay?"

"Yeah, I mean, I just-..." You stared into your drink. ".... I just...."

"(Y/n)?" She reached out to touch your hand.

You pulled away. ".... I'm just- ... sorry, that I'm about to get very informal."

"What?"

"So sorry, but you know what? Fuck you."

She looked stunned, pulling away. "Wha-?"

You stand up. "Y-yeah, I should go- you know what? How's this for a change of scenery."

She's staring in shock as you lean closer. "You're a-"

~

"Hey, Sans? Yeah, I need a ride home... Mhm, I'll explain on the way... Actually, there is something else, how about a job?"