Louise [Larry Stylinson AU]

Chapter 47

Harry's P.O.V. –

Dial the number. It's not difficult. It's just a number composed of multiple digits. But why is Harry Edward Styles scared of a phone number? Actually, the phone number isn't the scary part. The scary portion is the contact name that is 'Princess of England.' Yes, I want to call him but it's not easy. After all that I did, I'm scared. I'm not scared that he will pop his head out of the phone and smack me or something like that but it's not easy to talk to the person you have hurt so badly.

And maybe I don't want to know if he has been crying. I saw him cry the other day when I confronted him but it was heartbreaking. He deserves all the chocolates, pizzas and cuddles in this world instead of bullying, hate or sexual harassment. This reminds me that I have to complain to the school authorities about that freak.

Back to the phone, should I call him?

"Harry, are you sleeping?" Zayn said, knocking at the door of his room. I'm in his room which eventually means that I'm in his house. And why would he think I'm sleeping?

"No, I'm wide awake." I said, looking down at the phone in my hand. He opened the door and stepped inside.

"I'm going to meet Niall for the chemistry project and Liam is his partner and Perrie is mine but I didn't understand a term – Actually, I am confused between some pigments – I mean I can ask Perrie but maybe she wouldn't know – " Zayn rambled and I cut him off, "You could've said you're in the mood to date Niall or whatever you're going to do."

I chuckled when I noticed the blush rise to his cheeks.

"Have a nice time." I said when Zayn turned around to leave.

I looked down at my hands and there was a phone. It's a calling device made to connect people all around the world – Wait, I have to call my princess – I mean he's not mine but I call him princess and – You understood what I mean, isn't it? I deviated from the actual purpose.

I dialed the number with determination. My hands are shaking but it doesn't mean I regret doing it. I'm sweating because it's hot in this room. And I'm –

"H-Hello?" A broken voice said through the phone and it pinched my heart to hear him sad.

"Hello Louis, I wanted to know if you're okay and there are a lot of things that I want to talk about." I said.

"I'm fine." He replied in a shaky voice. He's crying. I feel so guilty.

"Louis, I'm really sorry about whatever I said that day and I know it isn't the best way to apologize on the phone but it won't be easy to face you." I said in a hurried tone.

"Oh poor girl!" He said suddenly.

"Um, Louis, are you okay?" I asked. Which 'girl' is he talking about?

"I'm fine. I don't care if you don't love me." He said. Was the girl 'Taylor'?

"I broke up with Taylor and whatever I said that day was a complete lie." I said, trying to explain.

I waited for his reply but I could only hear silent crying and movement. It seemed he was running up or down the stairs, I'm not sure. I heard a door being opened and more crying.

"Lou, please don't cry." I pleaded, trying to suppress my own tears.

"No, I'm fine. I- I have t-to get rid of it." He mumbled.

What does he mean? I don't recall anything that he needed to get rid of. Is he drunk? But he is usually happy-drunk and not sad-drunk. It means he is sober.

"Louis, I really hope it's not what I doubt it is. Where are you?" I asked.

I could hear water in the background, the type of noise when you fill a bath tub.

"In the bathroom, duh." He said sassily but his voice cracked at the end.

"N-now, d-don't disturb me, Harry. I'm b-busy. Let me find it." He said when I didn't say anything.

"What are you finding?" I asked almost whispering. I was breathing heavily now and I couldn't do anything. I paced around the room and opened the door before rushing downstairs.

"I'm finding a razor." He said bluntly.

It's enough. I'm rushing towards his house.

I could still hear sniffling on the other side and the sound of the water stopped.

"And...I found it. I love you Harry, my tree. Bye." He said softly before ending the call.

He just ended the call! And he found the razor and I can't help but get weird thoughts on my mind.

And the worst fact is, I couldn't tell him that I love him. I took a shaky breath and dialed his number but there was no response. He didn't accept the call. I tried many times but in vain.

I took a deep breath and then walked out of the house, ignoring Zayn's sister who was calling my name. Louis' house was too far from here. I don't have a car. I don't have a driving license. I can't waste time in walking. I could call the taxi. But I hope the taxi moves faster than light.

I can't lose Louis. I love him. I know it look a long time to realize it but I do. I can't lose my princess. All of this is either my fault or Zayn's or Mr. Grimshaw's fault. He shouldn't be the one to suffer.

I looked at my phone and then quickly called a taxi and waited. And as I waited, several memories came into my mind and made me a crying mess in front of the people. I was constantly wiping away my tears but that didn't help me to prevent the moments that came into my mind.

The first time when I saw Louis as 'Louise', he was beautiful. He seemed to be shy and while he was looking around, our eyes made contact and my heart fluttered. I remember the way he drinks water. He could gulp the whole amount at once. It's cute. And then there was our first date. And then there is the word 'cupid' which means a lot to me now.

He was crying because he couldn't select a dress and now...

I'm the reason of his tears.

And he had given the bracelet to me but I returned it. He was crying that time and I simply ignored it and thought that he was faking his sadness. It was so wrong to that. It was even worse to ask for the necklace. And he has gone through a lot more.

I could see him crying in pain, looking at me with hope. He wanted help. Or at least a smile. He was beaten up by the bullies and needed nothing more than comfort. And I was the stupid one who chose to ignore his condition because I thought that he deserved it.

When we were dating, I told him that I loved him. I loved him too much to hate him. I assured him that I would always love him, always support him...

And a while ago when I confronted him, I had said some hurtful words that should've never left my mouth. I saw the pain in his eyes. His tears glistened with sorrow. He looked hurt. He looked devastated.

I made him cry. But crying was still better.

But now, the same Louis had been hurt to such an extent that he was crying continuously. He found the razor and filled up the bath tub and was planning to kill himself.

The confident Louis has been transformed into an insecure one who wears a beanie all the time to hide his hair.

And if Louis hurts himself, I'll kill anyone who has caused him pain and that also includes me.

Lou, please don't leave me...

I love you...

But I'm scared.

Because life doesn't work according to your will. Some things don't happen the way you want them to.

And the worst of all, death is inevitable.