Where Have You Been All My Life

58|Back To Him

"Wonder what's cooking in her mind! I should keep an eye on her." Mihika mused, glaring Shagun whom Mihir has begun trusting but not her.

Back in the hospital, Ishita was having a tough time managing her fluttering senses and her job. She could barely concentrate, as all that she could think was Raman. How could he decide something on his own, about their life? It should always be mutual and he should know that he matters her a lot more than everything does. Even though it showed how much he loves her, she could not extract the pain that decision would instill in her, and their life. He would not be strong enough to deal with it, all alone, and the thought of him going through so much hurt like the other time, made her apprehensive and livid.

She had deliberated over everything happened last night. They were so urgent to feel each other and the talk followed still did slay her heart. She could see how much perturbed Raman appeared as he fell unconscious in her arms that night, beseeching her to let him live the way he is living. She had decided to give importance to her life, that was in Raman and their kids' happiness, after thinking a lot and still she has stick to that point only. However, he hiding things from her was taking a toll on her senses.

In the evening, glancing at the main doorway, to see whether her husband is coming a little earlier than usual, she has found none, disappointingly. He was taking too long to be backing home that worried her. She had wrapped up in taking care of the entire family, chattering with them, and playing with her kids but she needed him to be there, so that they could have a serious talk on what Geet has told her. She needed to make sure that she has heard it right, that Raman does not want a baby at all, just for her! It made her happy as much as it wrecked her. Is this the same man whom she married? She could not believe this man wants nothing else but her and her love.

Half past eight; she noted when he entered home, dazed. He had drunken that he needed Romi in tow to make him pace towards their bedroom. She did not say anything but her in-laws were cursing him for drinking. "Papaji...it's okay..." Ishita pleaded not to make it a big issue, surprising everyone.

"Yeh Ishita puttar hi hai nah!?" Om sighed at Toshi, astounded by Ishita's reaction as she was the one all this days would make a buzz of it whenever Raman comes home drinking.

"I think they're having some problems Bhalla ji. You know Raman was so tensed from last day." She said sadly and the family dispersed to sleep, keeping aside everything.

"Today, we all four will sleep together!" Simmi chirped taking Adi and Ruhi along with her to sleep with little Ananya, as she knows that the kids should not be watching her papa all drunk and senseless. Even though Raman would not show up this to kids, and Ishita is capable enough to manage, Simmi thought they need privacy.

Ishita stood aside when Romi came out after making Raman lie in the bed, removing his blazer and shoes. He had paused just in front of her and pressed her hand, reassuringly, and she had blinked her eyes indicating she knows everything would be fine. When Romi went off, she had stepped in, walking slowly towards him who was stirring in the bed. He lied on his back, feeling restive, as his shuteyes welled up, leaking from the corners that prickled her. She had lied beside him, ignoring all her misgivings regarding his decision, because at the end, what she wants is to see him smiling.

Whilst sleeping next to him, keeping her soft palm on his chest, patting it soothingly, she called him numerous times to see if he is in his senses. It appeared; he did not want to show that he could listen and see her clearly, even if he would not be in his complete self. Maybe, tonight, he was tanked-up and he wanted no one beside. He had turned his back to her, cuddling a pillow, avoiding her, just because he needed some space. He was unknowingly hurting her and she did not stay anymore. The first time after their marriage, she had slept off in the couch, giving him ample space to overcome his suffocation.